Post Content

Blondie, 9/28/22

Look, I don’t want to dwell on the technical details here, which seem to be based on the misconception that “well you look at Instagram on your phone so your account must be on your phone somewhere.” I instead want to engage with this strip on a narrative level. What exactly is the dangerous stalker planning to do with Elmo’s account? Post declarations of love from him to her? Send poison pen DMs to his friends and her potential romantic rivals? This is a significant escalation from snarky emojis and honestly he should be telling his parents about it, not some random unrelated neighbor-adult who sees the story primarily as being about the Kids Today, Who Are Not As Good As We Were When We Were Kids.

Daddy Daze, 9/28/22

Wait, did we know that the Daddy Daze daddy’s goth friend’s son was a teen? This is really opening up a lot of fun possibilities, honestly. I can’t decide if this kid is himself a goth, like a mini-me version of his dad, or instead has gone full on jock or preppie, as an act of defiance. Anyway, check out panel four here, where the dude has decided that blinding himself with scalding hot coffee is the logical next step in his story.

Hi and Lois, 9/28/22

Absolutely love that Hi has decided to rebel against the total overload we’re facing in the age of Too Much Streaming Content by engaging with the world as he assumes our primitive ancestors did: by reading a print magazine about golf. It’s clear from his facial expression that it didn’t work, but I’m proud of him for making the attempt.

Post Content

Daddy Daze, 9/27/22

The lure of doing a comic strip about a baby is eternal, but of course each generation will do their own particular version reflecting their ethos, worldview, and material conditions; and the fact that a syndicated comic strip is essentially a lifelong sinecure lets us contrast the varying generational attitudes directly against one another. Take Marvin, for instance: launched in 1982, as the Baby Boom generation was coming into its own and America was shaking off its post-Vietnam malaise, its title character represents the bold and unapologetic national attitude of the era: yes, Marvin shits and pisses himself constantly, and no he won’t apologize for it or learn how to stop. It’s someone else’s problem and the thought of them dealing with it makes him smile!

The Daddy Daze baby, on the other hand, is a creature of our current neurotic age. Like Marvin, he is unable to prevent himself from befouling his diaper several times a day, but his usual gleeful mania is actually just a pose, masking a deep, gnawing anxiety about all the pooping and the peeing. He knows he’s disgusting and he desperately wants to learn to use a toilet, but also knows that, as a baby in a syndicated comic strip, he’s never going to reach that promised land and well just be stewing in his own waste for all eternity.

Gasoline Alley, 9/27/22

Say what you will about Gasoline Alley, and lord knows I’ve said a lot, but it remains a piece of true outsider art that’s somehow pumped into the reading lists of surviving loyal newspaper readers across the English-speaking world. Can you imagine tricking major publishers into printing the sentence “Blimey, my red sock has entangled itself betwixt the keys and rendered me immobile for the moment” in thousands of newspapers as some sort of avant-garde action, or maybe as a prank? Of course not, and yet everyone involved in the process that produced this strip thinks it’s normal, wholesome fun. No, I am absolutely not going to explain what’s happening here, by the way, you don’t need to know and don’t particularly want to, trust me.

Gil Thorp, 9/27/22

No! No! We cannot lose Coach Kaz! I don’t care if the Time Corps has recruited him as an agent in our nation’s shadowy war against those who would alter the space-time continuum — we need his antics in Milford!

Funky Winkerbean, 9/27/22

My immediate reaction to the first panel of this strip is that Jessica wanted Darrin to somehow make the gun that Plantman used to murder her father into a plaything for their son. But then, based on everyone’s facial expressions, by the end of the strip I decided she actually wanted it made into some sort of sex toy. I’m not well, but in my defense, neither is Funky Winkerbean.

Post Content

Click the banner to contribute by PayPal, or here for other options.

It’s the 2022 Comics Curmudgeon Summer Fundraiser!

Soapers, joke-a-day, and occasional adventure strips are the meat and potatoes of The Comics Curmudgeon, but sometimes a body just craves something sweet. Prime your insulin pumps!

Rose Is Rose, 8/31/22

With Dondi’s 1986 retirement, Pasquale Gumbo became the undisputed Most Annoying Child in comics. Wikipedia says he “embodies the innocence that we only find in youth.” He has no bad traits, worships his Dad, plays with his Guardian Angel, works hard in school, goes on fantastical dream-adventures, and inhabits a world of adorable birds, squirrels, rainbows, and stars. He is also the Zodiac Killer, Ebola virus Patient Zero, and directly responsible for the 1999 Indo-Pakistan War.

Breaking Cat News 8/31/22

Normally a joke-a-day strip, Breaking Cat News is midway through an extended arc about how the rediscovery of a sealed-off addition to the Big Pink House will somehow resolve a financial crisis that threatens The Family with eviction. Here, the Robber Mice return from patrol to announce that the addition’s funky dècor is untouched since the 1970’s so a good dusting will make it move-in ready. How this will resolve the financial crisis is not yet known, but awwwww … CATS!

Mutts, 8/31/22

In related Cat News, anybody who’s met a real cat knows that ladybug has about ten seconds to live.

Daddy Daze, 8/31/22

Angus is in fact invisible; this child is an imposter. Watch your back Mr. Daze!

Mark Trail, 8/31/22

Once a rough-and-tumble adventure strip where Mark and Johnny Malotte clawed their way across ice floes to kill and eat delicious seals, Mark Trail has evolved through twists and turns into an ensemble comedy with a floating cast of vaguely nature-themed social-media oddballs, including, increasingly, Mark himself.

In the current story, Mark teams up with BikBok [sic] goose wrangler and Cherry heartthrob Rex Scorpius on the road to investigate Tess Tiger’s Tiger Touch Roadside Zoo/Spa and Secret Cult for fox-lovin’ Amy Lee, Mark’s Teen Sparkle editor and producer Diana Daggers’ old Racoon Rangers pal. Here, Rex ditches client Jimmy Songbird’s keytar recital to Facetime his puppy. Who‘s a good boy?

The ringing in your ears is normal and will pass if you lie down for a few minutes. Maybe eat a seal or two.

–Uncle Lumpy