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Rex Morgan, M.D., 1/6/24

Personally, if I had fled in the middle of the night from the people I had defrauded in order to avoid a lawsuit, and also was presumably on probation for attempted murder chargers, I would not hang around in a room full of the people I had wronged just to confirm that Rex Morgan was the ultimate architect of my current setback, no matter how good my fake beard skills were. In fact, I would simply leave Glenwood altogether if it seemed that all of my evil schemes were being foiled by Glenwood’s most prominent doctor! That’s just me, though. I’m not telling Rene how to do his job. But, honestly, he seems pretty bad it, so maybe he could use the advice.

The Lockhorns, 1/6/24

“I know this, of course, because of our varied, intense, and enthusiastically consensual BDSM-centered sex life. ‘Wallet area’ is what I call his ass when I’m mixing things up with a little financial humiliation play.”

Daddy Daze, 1/6/24

We all know about the Daddy Daze daddy, who speaks in normal human language, and about the Daddy Daze baby, who speaks in a series of “ba”s that the Daddy Daze daddy purports to understand and translates for the benefit of us, the readers. Well, today we learn about the Daddy Daze grandaddy, who speaks in series of asterisks that the Daddy Daze daddy purports to understand and translates for the benefit of us, the readers. Pretty crazy, huh? That’s 2024, baby. Who knows what surprises await!

Family Circus, 1/6/24

RED ALERT RED ALERT DOLLY HAS BECOME AWARE OF FEMINISM, REPEAT, DOLLY HAS BECOME AWARE OF FEMINISM

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/16/23

Wow, did Buzzy always have such dreamy cerulean eyes? Also, did he always have such a slavish devotion to the guy who locked him in a car trunk for days? Beginning to suspect that Rene’s whole ego death routine was just part of a larger plan and he’s been mind-controlling Buzzy all along, which ironically just goes to show how powerful and useful the Mirakle Method really is.

Beetle Bailey, 11/16/23

See Sarge’s heavy lidded expression in panel two? That’s a man who’s wishing for a real infantry war to flare up one of these days so that he can order this guy — order all of these guys, really — to be fearless, dedicated, and focused, and to demonstrate that by advancing straight into incoming machine gun fire.

Daddy Daze, 11/16/23

There are plenty of comics characters who I dearly wish would get punched in the face, to the extent that I lie awake at night imagining it, but the poor hapless Daddy Daze daddy, whatever his faults, is not among them. It’s just sad! It’s sad that he has to make up an elaborate language of “ba”s with his child to somehow pretend his pain makes sense!

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Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/10/23

The Marvin crossover we never hoped we’d see.

Gil Thorp, 8/10/23

Meanwhile it’s Relationship Week over at Gil Thorp, establishing or recapping its myriad cross‑cultural, ‑gender, ‑institutional, and other conflicts in advance of the fall season. Here, Sluggin’ Girls’ Softball right fielder Inma Rimsha and disgraced Valley Tech import hurler Kwan Tak “The Korean Nightmare” share a tender moment. Protip, Inma: if you want to win Kwan’s heart, bring a sack of Haitai Honey Butter Chips along to your next picnic. Although signs suggest his heart is as far as you’re gonna get.

Daddy Daze, 8/10/23

Gah, is there a more relentlessly wretched comics character than Paul Daze’s Goth Pal Chuck Chuck? Yes! Imagine his children, cruller-stuffed and sugar-high, rolling around their dank rooms writing abuse memoirs and plotting his murder.

Pearls Before Swine, 8/10/23

Chuck Chuck has one thing right, though: the donuts always find a way in.

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—Uncle Lumpy