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Crock, 11/14/21

Crock has a long-running bit about how there’s a talking chicken who’s always on the verge of being cooked and eaten by the strip’s Legionnaires, but I don’t think they’ve ever implied before that this chicken has magic powers, beyond the ability to speak English (or, depending on how you think the Crock world-building works, French that’s getting translated into English for the American reading audience). Anyway, for some reason it’s really amusing me to think that the POOF between the last two panels is not meant to represent a genie’s summoning spell, but instead elides a sequence where the chicken manages to procure booze, a fast car, and a willing woman for the fort’s cook through non-magical means, like persuasion or calling in a bunch of favors or something. Would the fact that he’s a talking chicken make these tasks easier or more difficult for him to accomplish? Discuss.

Dennis the Menace, 11/14/21

Based on the title of today’s strip, I first assumed that Mr. Wilson was planning to launch a hip-hop career, and then I saw the WANTED poster and figured maybe we were about to learn that he was a criminal and he’s been on the run from the law this whole time. But no, it just turns out that all of his wife’s friends know he’s an asshole.

Hi and Lois, 11/14/21

Ha ha! It’s funny because nobody in Hi’s family wants to spend time with him, not even his baby!

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Dennis the Menace, 11/9/21

I guess the joke here is supposed to be that Dennis is misinterpreting a traditional bridal party as some sort of harem situation? But in fact since all the women on this TV are wearing different colored dresses, and none of them appear to be the bride, it’s actually pretty reasonable to assume that the Mitchells are watching The Bachelor or a The Bachelor-style reality romance show, which would make Dennis’s question not menacing at all but just a standard commentary on the nature of the TV program. Either way, I don’t appreciate the “Eh? Eh? Sex?” look that Henry is giving us.

Mary Worth, 11/9/21

Oh my God, it’s only Tuesday — it is, I can’t emphasize enough, only Tuesday — and already Wilbur is singing angrily yelling Justin Timberlake’s 2002 hit “Cry Me A River” at Estelle and her date, who appears to have frozen in place, hoping nobody will notice him. Only Tuesday! How will Estelle counter???

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/9/21

“Ah yes, ‘blue skies’ — our old, uncrackable code for all’s clear. Thank goodness for our military background so we can communicate in utter secrecy this way. Now let’s read the next sentence, which — ah. Hmm.”

Dick Tracy, 11/9/21

When your mind finally snaps, what gibberish sentence will you be vacantly pecking out on a typewriter, over and over? I was never sure until today, but now I know it’s going to be “My name is Sam Catchem. I ordered Volume Six of ‘Derby Dugan: The Geebus Years.’” And you know what? I’m at peace with that.

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Dick Tracy, 11/3/21

I know I shouldn’t quibble about “realism” in a strip that features a seedy bar called “Bucket of Blood,” one of the patrons of which is a guy named “Bogart the Roach” who’s dressed like [gestures vaguely at today’s Dick Tracy]. But I do find it very funny that Dick has decided that for this undercover assignment, he’s going to don a hoodie, that sleazy garment worn only by known scumbags like Mark Zuckerberg, and he got one the exact same yellow color as his usual trench coat and fedora. Does this compromise the disguise aspect of the outfit? Maybe, but you have to understand this: it’s his signature color.

Mary Worth, 11/3/21

I have to sincerely apologize for assuming yesterday that Wilbur was rejecting Pierre. If I had given it more than 30 seconds of thought, I would have realized that Wilbur is never the rejecter and always the rejectee in any given social situation. Anyway, I think you should absolutely follow your instincts on this one, Wilbur.

Hi and Lois, 11/3/21

Damn, it’s a good thing that only we are privy to the contents of Trixie’s thought balloons, and that Lois has no idea what’s going on in that weird little head of hers, because otherwise she’d be crushed to learn that she has a stupid baby who doesn’t even understand the basics of how our heliocentric solar system works. Look at that innocent smile on her face! She doesn’t realize at all! It’s sad, really.

Dennis the Menace, 11/3/21

I feel like that is a look of genuine pathos on Mr. Wilson’s face that simply can’t be explained away by his foot being asleep. “I know the doctor said to lay of sweets,” he’s thinking, “but I don’t want to lose my leg! I don’t think I can handle it! Martha! Martha!”