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Dick Tracy, 11/12/20

Ah, it appears this meteorite heist is not meant to provide an illicit space-rock as a trophy for some wealthy malcontent trawling the dark web eager for a forbidden object to show off to his friends; rather, Yeti and Daisy are just going to extract its valuable mineral content in order to cover their not inconsiderable expenses. In a way, it fits in with Yeti’s whole deal, which is that he’s a poisoner in a fallen world, where nobody likes to poison people to death anymore. I’m sure he’ll sigh wistfully as he watches the meteorite melt away, thinking of its long journey through space and the sort of wealthy supercriminal who in a better era might have enjoyed giving it a place of honor in the trophy room in his mega-yacht or undersea lair. Then he’ll shake his head, pick up his phone, and make contact with the multinational metallurgical conglomerate he’s going to sell the minerals to via a Cayman Islands shell corporation.

Hi and Lois, 11/12/20

So the joke here is “Ha ha, turns out Hi and Thirsty waxed horny within earshot of the kids,” but my favorite thing is that Hi is already wearing a dull, gobsmacked expression before we even get to this revelation. It’s like he’s still processing the idea that Chip might want to go golfing with him. “Chip? On the golf course? With me? But … the golf course is where I go to not see Chip.”

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Dick Tracy, 11/11/20

I gotta tell you, I’ve been extremely uninterested in this Dick Tracy plot so far, which has involved … poison gas? A couple new weirdo criminals (“Daisy” and “Yeti”) whose gimmicks don’t really seem to sync up? Enh. But I am a fickle Comics Curmudgeon, faithful readers, and everything about today’s strip delights me. The sudden pivot to meteorite theft? The idea that there’s some kind of lucrative black market for meteorites out there? The managing editor at the The Daily deciding that there should be a front page banner headline about a new meteorite exhibit at the museum, and that the approximate dollar value of the meteorite is the most important thing to emphasize in said banner headline? The gratuitious slam on Daisy’s literacy? It’s all perfect and delightful, and I hope for more of this and less of the stuff that I already can’t really remember very clearly and cannot be bothered to go read again to make sure I got the details right in this post.

Gil Thorp, 11/11/20

Gil Thorp, meanwhile, has finally reached that all-important point in every storyline where Gil can no longer ignore the increasingly dumb antics that his student-athletes have gotten up to so far this semester. Today’s he’s decided to deal with the current set of problem children by yelling at them and, you know what? Fair.

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Gil Thorp, 11/2/20

So the big Gil Thorp fall plot is this: not only are two young gentlemen competing for the starting quarterback job, but they’re also vying for the affections of sassy newcomer Corina Karenna. One of the lads (I haven’t bothered learning their names and I’m not planning on doing so any time soon) has figured out that the best way to a girl’s heart is to recognize that she exists as an autonomous human with interests of her own outside himself, and is coming to watch her play volleyball, which is nice, and he’s bringing half the football team with him. These guys don’t know jack about volleyball, obviously, unlike volleyball superfan Dallas, who I’d like to imagine had the bleachers to himself every game before this. I also don’t know jack about volleyball, so I’d also like to imagine that “libero” is an entirely made-up term and Dallas is just fucking with these meatheads.

Mary Worth, 11/2/20

Aww, looks like it’s the dark night of the soul for our star-crossed lovers! Tommy is singing “The Sound of Silence” in his mind right now, because he was belting it out earlier before Mary knocked on the door to say that “Simon and Garfunkel seem like nice young men but it’s after eight o’cock, dear.”

Dick Tracy, 11/2/20

Is … is Dick Tracy really the guy you want on this? Is he going to arrest a gas leak? Or, more likely, shoot a gas leak while it’s “trying to escape”?

Dennis the Menace, 11/2/20

The best thing about this, to me? I think it’s safe to assume that Mr. Wilson is financially comfortable enough to buy all the groceries he needs, so this manual labor he’s doing in his garden bed is for fun, at some level. Dennis is right! Adulthood blows!