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Panels from Slylock Fox, 2/20/22

Today’s Six Differences offer an even more disturbing and nightmarish world than usual. The vision of a giant bottle containing four enormous and very much alive flies, which presumably this frog is going to somehow suck out through the nipple, is extremely disturbing to me. Plus you’ve got to take into consideration the fact that an actual baby frog would be a tadpole, so this is clearly an adult engaging in some kind of weird infantilization fetish play with the “nurse” cat. And all out in public to boot! That owl and that rabbit are absolutely correct to be angry about this.

Dustin, 2/20/22

God, look at Dustin’s dad’s hooded eyes in that final panel: he is so unpleasantly proud of himself for coming up with this bit, which I guarantee the car scammer heard exactly two words of before he realized his grift wasn’t working and hung up the phone. Dustin’s mom is loving it, though! These two deserve each other.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 2/20/22

I’m posting the whole strip here just so you can see the latest legally dubious plot developments, but all I want to talk about is Rene striding into this room like a king and confidently bellowing “Rene Belluso is here. Let the meeting commence!” This would absolutely set a great tone for any meeting of any sort, whether held in person or on Zoom, and I urge you to try it at the next opportunity. You can say your actual name or just say “Rene Belluso,” I’m sure either would work great.

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Crock, 2/13/22

“Trooper Megan” was added to the case of Crock years ago in an attempt to mollify the woke mob who threatened to cancel this widely beloved strip because its gang of scrappy, lovable French people imposing colonial rule on Algeria were all, sexistly, men. Unfortunately, we can see that true equality has not been achieved in the Foreign Legion, because Megan is primarily in charge of the occupation’s emotional labor.

Dustin, 2/13/22

Dustin is, of course, a strip about put-upon old people and the young people they have to deal with in their lives, who are, a result of their youngness, terrible. And you might ask: what are young people supposed to take away from this? Why should they get on board? Well, today’s strip makes it clear: there’s always someone younger and more terrible than you to look down on.

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Dustin, 2/4/22

“I mean, why would I stress about that? That whole thing is Dustin’s generation’s problem, and I don’t even like him! Anyway, if anyone needs me for the next hour, I’ll be in the bathroom, shitting.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 2/4/22

Wow, it’s kind of amazing that Rex and June spent so much endless and extremely uninteresting time musing about whether Sarah could emotionally handle the publicity and fame of being a big-shot author about a cat who’s also a cop, and yet apparently didn’t bother checking to see if the Morgan family could legally and financially handle it if she got sued. Was this guy their lawyer then? He’d better hope he wasn’t, because Rex in panel three definitely looks like he’s going to murder whatever lawyer fucked this up, right before he murders Kyle Vidpa.

Beetle Bailey, 2/4/22

Hey, remember in the ’90s, when potato chip companies tried to market chips made with a zero-calorie fat substitute called “Olestra” despite the fact that they had to put a label on the bags that said, in a phrase that I assume was the end product of a lot of hilarious back-and-forth with the FDA, that they caused “loose stools”? Frito Lay’s version of these chips were marketed under the WOW brand, something that just popped into my mind, probably for no reason.