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Dennis the Menace, 5/20/17

Ooh, look at that facial expression on Dennis: that’s the look of a kid who, against his better judgement and true sentiment, is about to agree with a bigger, meaner kid and mock his good pal Mr. Wilson for his low-tech ways. Dennis is about to become the most menacing things around: someone who, under social pressure from a bully, turns on one of his friends.

Pluggers, 5/20/17

Whoa there, this panel is veering dangerously towards questioning plugger orthodoxy on the Second Amendment, which among other things dictates that boxes of ammunition should be the easiest kinds of packages to open! Anyway, this plugger’s facial expression indicates that someone in the supply chain that produced this bag of chips is soon going to be tasting hot lead; unfortunately, it’s probably going to not be the packaging engineer who designed the bag but rather the poor sap at the gas station who sold it to him.

Family Circus, 5/20/17

As a rule, I assume all Family Circus panels consist of repurposed art from 1975 or earlier, and sometimes when the caption refers to contemporary pop culture or technology, I try to guess what the original was. In this case, I’m thinking it was “You hang that up right now, Jeffy! Phones don’t work in cars! This is the devil’s work, do you hear me? THE DEVIL’S WORK”

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Crankshaft, 5/18/17

I admit despite myself that I’m weirdly fascinated by this Bubba Watson cameo in Crankshaft this week, which has mostly served as a variation on one of the strip’s running “jokes,” which is that the guys are cruel to and dismissive of Lena, who has never been show to be anything but a nice person. Anyway, one thing that’s really jumped out at me is that Watson’s caricature hasn’t had any actual dialogue, as if he’s in this strip because he actually lost a real-life bet, but has negotiated some concessions to retain a smidgen of dignity.

The Lockhorns, 5/18/17

I guess Leroy’s diagonal lean is supposed to represent the fact that he’s getting down from the barstool and heading home to spend time with his hated wife, but I prefer to believe that he’s just about to teeter over into drunken unconsciousness, and “unhappy hour” is his little nickname for being face-down blackout drunk on the filthy floor of a bar.

Family Circus, 5/18/17

Yes, Kittycat does pray before meals. She prays to Bast, the cat goddess of the Egyptians, a much more ancient god than the one her cruel, melon-headed captors worship. She prays … for vengeance.

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Mary Worth, 4/28/17

Wow, Esme’s just groping Derek, a total stranger, like a big slab of meat, huh? I guess the rules really are different out in international waters! Meanwhile, I just hope the lady in the top hat in the background in panel one finds true love. It’s not glamorous, but somebody has to wear the hat!

Family Circus, 4/28/17

Not sure if anyone had “killed by a demonic sewer-clown” in the How Will The Keane Kids Die pool, but I don’t think we’re going to get that many complaints!