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Family Circus, 2/24/08

O Sunday Family Circus, why do you insist on the being baffling and totally insane? These snowman scenarios grow increasingly deranged and disturbing as you move clockwise through the strip. “Snowy’s Kindergarden” is forgettable treacle; one might be tempted to gloss over the Symphony Hall entry with equal speed, except that upon closer inspection it appears that our be-headphoned conductor snowbeing may actually be inside the symphony hall? And if so, would there by any more disturbing moment for a professional concert musician than coming into work one day and finding a pile of snow on the floor and a ghastly simulacrum of your conductor grinning dumbly and listening to headphones?

From there, it gets worse. Obviously the melting snowman at the global warming talk is a horrifying nightmare; the way it’s cradling its head, desperately trying to keep it from falling off its rapidly shrinking neck and rolling across the floor, would be poignant if it weren’t so terrifying. And finally, we arrive at … OK, where is that? Does that building in the background have bars on the window? Is that snowman in prison? My God, it’s in prison, isn’t it? And that rolling ball in front of it is … what, exactly? The severed head of a prison snitch? The mind boggles?

If we want good, old-fashioned fun, we need to turn to people who know how to have a good time … pirates!

Panel from the Phantom, 2/24/08

WOO! PIRATE PARTY! Even when it’s about over, you can see they’re having a good time, because they’re still laughing it up! With their pirate antics! WOO! HA HA! Sunday’s strip got all Phantom-fisty and skull-marky after this point, but I just wanted to linger on the moment when the pirates were allowed to have their fun.

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Faithful reader lesles was getting concerned about the AJGLU 3000. Sure, it doesn’t have a torso or need for “clothes” as such, but as the Comics Curmudgeon store was online, it would know that it was being slighted when it came to merch! That’s why he rectified the situation with his brilliant design, which you can purchase over the Internet!

When you wear this shirt and wander by a Webcam, the AJGLU 3000’s transistors will be warmed by the love you show. As usual, if you want this logo on some garment that isn’t there yet, just e-mail me (though I don’t think it will work on dark shirts).

Also available! Dark versions of the lady cops and waitresses design! Buy them for your friends and family!

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Hi kids! This is Josh, back behind the wheel of the blog. Just wanted to thank Uncle Lumpy for his inimitable filling in (and, to reply to a few questions in the comments, I try to pay him, but he won’t let me!). Friday comics coming Friday, but a few random comics-related items of interest have come in that should be brought to your attention now!

We begin with our very first photo of Jungle Patrol-themed merchandise! Faithful reader Michele is proud to proclaim that lady cops and waitresses are in fact tougher than pirates, and indeed to prove it in this photo. Look at how cowed and nonthreatening that pirate looks at the mere sight of that fine t-shirt!

Also! The always awesome This Week In Milford blog alerts us to an exciting development! Comic artist Steve Bryant has a blog named Atomic Tiki Studio, on which he says that he recently tried out as the new artist for Gil Thorp. He didn’t get the gig, but this does reveal to the world that the syndicate is in the market for a new Gil Thorp artist — so, aspiring comic drawing-types, start your submissions! Bryant also posts some of his tryout strips, which are drawn based on scripts from the current A-Train story arc. Interesting to see the gang with an entirely different look, though Gil himself looks a little too meaty for my taste. Damn it, the man’s supposed to be defined by a series of impossible straight lines!

Also! A faithful reader deep within the Sanford Herald of North Carolina points me to a blog post from his boss about the trials and tribulations of attempting to add new comics to a newspaper. It’s pretty revelatory as to why exactly there’s so much legacy cruft out there.

Also! And finally! Another faithful reader sent me a link his own Apartment 3-G fan art. Yes, it’s safe for work, you sickos. Enjoy!