Archive: Rhymes with Orange

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Rhymes With Orange, 11/10/24

Hey, everybody. Have you ever wondered if demons, the dark angels who have turned their back on God and now live in Hell, where they have the job of inflicting awful tortures on the damned for all eternity, have to go to school, like orindary children? Well, apparently they do. I’m just as surprised as you, to be honest. Doesn’t seem like it’d be up their alley in my opinion. They really strike me as being more into the cursing their Creator and inflicting inhuman suffering on his creations kind of thing rather than learning new information and skills in a supportive environment.

Dennis the Menace, 11/10/24

“Based on the fact that he’s walking towards Mr. Wilson’s house, I bet he’s walking towards Mr. Wilson’s house.” Do you even hear yourself, Henry? Do you and your wife truly have nothing better to talk about than this? That’s sad, man.

Crock, 11/10/24

Every once in a while I like to play the game of “What Year’s Topical Issue Is Today’s Crock Rerun About?” This one clearly is about “health care reform,” obviously. But, that doesn’t really narrow it down: was it from 2010? 1993? 1974? 1945? Could be any of them! This strip’s been around forever!

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Phantom, 9/13/24

The AI-powered Avarice bot learns from the creatures around it and imitates their behavior! It won’t be long before it’s hoarding priceless relics, lording it over the natives, and acting like a dick to the Jungle Patrol!

Zits, 9/13/24

Jeremy achieves Singularity with a polite, considerate, relatable AI version of himself. But I call shenanigans: there’s no way the AI learned those behaviors by training on the Internet.

Rhymes with Orange, 9/13/24

Oh c’mon everybody knows commercials are for looking at your phone.

Gil Thorp, 9/13/24

My only connection to football is a vestigial fondness for the Green Bay Packers from the dairyland of my birth. But in the words of our compatriots over at This Week in Milford, what the hell is going on here? Green Team’s QB is passing left but Milford’s defenseman intercepts it on the right. Did our point of view cross the line in panel two? And where’s the runback? Anybody looking to disprove the General Relativity theory of space-time should fire a couple electrons into Gil Thorp.

Sherman’s Lagoon, 9/13/24

Fillmore sits in homage to his idol Truck Tyler, waiting for inspiration. Sadly, Hawthorne’s assaults will cause his pickin’ finger to lock up.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/13/24

All that bullyin’ don’t sit well with Truck, who knows a thing or two about sittin’.


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Hi and Lois, 6/25/24

Over at here at Hi and Lois, we’re working to reassure you that it’s not just desperate old people falling for those “Make Money At Home – Set Your Own Hours!” scams on Facebook. No, teenagers are falling for them too! Or at least we’re pretty sure they are. We asked our grandson “What’re you looking at on your phone, buddy? Facebook?” and his grunted reply seemed like an affirmative, so we’re running with that.

Rhymes With Orange, 6/25/24

Um actually Adam, it wasn’t the “tree of knowledge,” it was the “tree of knowledge of good and evil,” so maybe you can annoy your wife when the kid gets to his ethics homework, huh? Oh, what’s that, you, as one of the only two adult humans alive, weren’t planning on teaching him ethics? Do you want to raise Cain, the first murderer? Because that’s how you get Cain, the first murderer.

Marvin, 6/25/24

[desperately trying to think of something non-poop related to say about Marvin] You ever notice how messed up the feet in Marvin look? Check out those feet! The heels are sticking out further from the leg than the toes! And those toes … well, just try imagining what they look like under those “shoes”! Ha ha! Real messed up, right? Messed up enough to purge all thought of the poop jokes from your mind?