Archive: Rhymes with Orange

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Rhymes With Orange, 4/9/26

I assume the intended joke here is that George forgot his glasses somewhere else — at his home, maybe, or maybe just in the other room — but I can’t stop imagining a truly nightmarish scenario where when you die you become a spirit cursed to haunt the world of the living but not be perceived by them, and if you had bad vision when you were alive you still do, but you can’t wear glasses because you’re a spectre without physical form and/or you don’t have a nose. Anyway, that ghost is gonna fuck that cabinet, right? That’s definitely what’s on the menu here?

Archie, 4/9/26

Jughead, sad that his conversations with his best friend aren’t as sparkling as they once were, has hired this high-tech young woman to, in his words, “Cyrano” for him, monitoring Archie’s mood on a tablet and relaying instructions into a hidden bluetooth earpiece. Unfortunately, it turns out she may have overrepresented her talents.

Hi and Lois, 4/9/26

Don’t have much to say about the Flagston twins’ specific conundrum here but I do like the expression on the bus driver’s face. That’s someone who’s extremely sick of these kids’ shit. Not sure if it’s about Dot and Ditto specifically or just children in general, but either way I’m enjoying it.

Crankshaft and Shoe, 4/9/26

Hey, uh. Um. How to put this delicately. I think if you’re involved in the process of churning out a legacy comic strip, maybe you … shouldn’t … do jokes that are like, “You know what’s better than a hack writer? AI! Ha ha!” Just, like … don’t give people ideas, you know? About your job?

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Family Circus, 3/11/26

A thing I never would’ve predicted more than two decades ago when I started doing this blog is … well, I guess the fact that I’d still be doing the blog in 2026 would be at the top of the list, but not far below would be the fact that I’d become an increasingly less grudging fan of the Family Circus. Lesser strips like Marvin do pee and poop jokes all the time and I get no pleasure from it, but this is a perfectly executed panel capturing the moment right before PJ horks directly onto Big Daddy Keane’s face. Daddy knows it, PJ knows it, it’s inevitable, but we don’t have to see it or hear it directly addressed, and I think that’s beautiful.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/11/26

Hey, you know how Rex Morgan, M.D., is boring, a significant majority of the time? Well, today we learn that, while we’ve been watching all these boring characters do uninteresting things, there’s at least one guy who’s been hanging out off-panel experiencing even less excitement than everyone else. Truly chilling.

Rhymes With Orange, 3/11/26

Sure, we all enjoy a stage magic act. But did you know that the only thing preventing the rabbits and the birds from having sex with each other is a corporate-style HR policy? And call me a “woke scold” or whatever but I’m in favor of it. The rabbit and the bird shouldn’t have sex! It would screw up the workplace dynamics, plus I don’t even understand how it would work, biologically!

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Heathcliff, 2/8/26

I gotta respect these guys for saying to hell with the NFL’s trademarks and hanging a giant banner that says “SUPER BOWL” from the ceiling of their living room to mark their Super Bowl party. Sure, it’s not strictly necessary, but it’s festive, and what if an outside viewer caught a glimpse of the room and had forgotten what day it was and needed a signifier in order to parse what exactly they were looking at? These revelers are true heroes. A living room “SUPER BOWL” sign, a dip cat, aliens and robots trying to stymie that dip cat for some reason, but not really trying very hard — all good, normal stuff.

Rhymes With Orange, 2/8/26

I kind of enjoy the way these people, who I assume just recently died, are casually chatting as they queue up to be tortured for all eternity. They spent their life weighted down by sin, so they aren’t surprised to be here or anything, though they are surprised to discover their sins are actually cute li’l anthropomorphized demons.