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Dick Tracy, 10/14/21

Say, remember a few weeks ago, when Dick seemed to grudgingly agree that a free press is an important element in society and gave an interview to some lady from a newspaper? Well, surprise: that lady was a criminal, and Dick, who’s never forgotten a single misshapen criminal skull he’s laid eyes on, knew it at the time, but gave her the benefit of the doubt. Too bad, because it looks like she doesn’t even work for the fake news after all! Wait, does not working for the fake news make her better or worse? Either way, I’m sure Dick is regretting not shooting her while she was trying to escape from the interview.

Shoe, 10/14/21

I’m a strong believer in the Occam’s Joke Razor, by which I mean that when it comes to setup material, entities should not be multiplied beyond necessity. However, this should be balanced against the Law of Joke Specificity, which says that specific things are more funny the vague ones. Take today’s Shoe, for example. To set up the punchline, the lady bird needs to say she has a particular dream job, because it wouldn’t make a ton of sense otherwise; but the strip goes so specific, having her claim she wants to work at an English department store that went out of business in 2006, that you sort of expect that to feed into the punchline, when it really doesn’t. That said, I do enjoy the loving way the Perfesser is gazing into his beer glass in the second panel. I think we know what he is doing in his dreams when he’s not working, ha ha! (He’s getting bombed in the middle of the afternoon.)

Dennis the Menace, 10/14/21

Speaking of facial expressions, I am absolutely loving Alice’s face and body language here. This is the moment when she realizes that Dennis is never going to become a functional enough person to move out of the house, and she is not OK with it!

Mary Worth, 10/14/21

Speaking of facial expressions, I’m interpreting Libby’s here as one of grim determination. She’s not sure how many more piece of furniture she’ll need to piss on to break Estelle of the Wilbur habit once and for all, but she’s willing to do whatever it takes.

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Shoe, 9/28/21

The obvious version of this joke would have the Professor deliver his first line looking at his desk at work, or maybe in his home office. But nope, instead he’s saying it while looking at his living room chair, and I assume that the “lots” he has to do involves catching up on various prestige television shows and finishing off yesterday’s pizza and snacks, which he’s blowing off to read about golf instead. A true legend of sloth!

Blondie, 9/28/21

I’ve never really gotten a handle on how old Elmo is supposed to be, exactly, but I refuse to acknowledge a scenario where he’s capable of drawing Mr. Dithers’s and Dagwood’s faces (side note: there is no reason for Elmo to have ever met or even seen a picture of Mr. Dithers) with such precision, and yet be unable to properly write the letter E. I have to assume that he’s chosen a whimsical “childish” signature as part of his artistic #brand, which may explain why he’s placed (in-universe) photorealistic drawings on stick-figure bodies.

Beetle Bailey, 9/28/21

You’ve got to admit that “killed stateside by friendly fire” was always the most probably way for Beetle Bailey to die, just edging out “organ failure from repeated beatings from Sarge” and “slept too hard.”

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Dennis the Menace, 9/14/21

I am absolutely in love with the idea of Mr. Wilson’s identity as a jazz hepcat suddenly becoming another weak point that Dennis can use to send him into paroxysms of rage. I’m not sure which interpretation of today’s strip would be funnier: that Dennis was letting loose with some wild, atonal acid jazz when Mr. Wilson just wants to jam out to Dave Brubeck, or that Dennis was playing square, Lite FM Kenny G bullshit that Mr. Wilson thinks sullies the good name of jazz.

Gasoline Alley, 9/14/21

I do not care about the current Gasoline Alley storyline and refuse to explain even the basics to you, but I do love the final panel here, which in a more interesting world would be the capper of a storyline in which in adorable, aw-shucks talking bear finally answers for his crimes against humanity at the Hague.

Shoe, 9/14/21

“Ha ha, get it? But seriously, they keep running a bunch of tests but can’t figure out what’s wrong with me. They’re pretty sure I’m dying, though.”