Archive: Zits

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Gil Thorp, 6/6/25

Deep in the 2020 pandemic lockdowns, I decided that the dream of the ’90s had finally well and truly died, and I shaved off my goatee and then grew in a full beard that I’ve maintained ever since (apologies to all if it unnerves you to learn that my caricature in this blog’s logo is not fully accurate, facial hair-wise). Marty clung onto the Evil Spock look for another five years, but now, as part of his strategy to get his life together, he’s gone with the mustachio’d look that an increasing number of the kids today seem to like. And it’s clearly a good move: he’s already going to sub for his replacement on some terrible morning radio talk show, mere minutes after getting home from the barber who ceremonially sheared him! I like the fact that his dog is licking his mustache clean, presumably to get the last of the facial hair food residue that he’s used to feasting on.

Mary Worth, 6/6/25

Wilbur and Dawn’s poisoned dinner continues to go great, and by “great” I mean “insanely,” with both Westons continuing to talk like everything is basically normal despite being clearly convinced that Belle is going to disembowel them with a spoon. I love that all intra-Weston solidarity is out the window at this point, with each hoping to be the one person that whoever’s at the door is going to save, leaving the other to their fate at Belle’s hands.

Mother Goose and Grimm and Zits, 6/6/25

Polyamory! You’re hearing about it more and more, and lots of people are saying, “Why not? Let’s give it a try!” Well, the syndicated newspaper comics aren’t having it, do you hear them? They’re not having it.

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Luann, 5/6/25

Luann is perennially on its weird psychosexual bullshit — Luann and Phil, who are college-aged adults, have already smooched but somehow Luann has to come up with weird elaborate scenarios to hang out with him, like “accidentally” making too much lasagna and inviting him over as a companion to their old lady friend to eat the leftovers — but I do enjoy the punchline panel here, in which Mrs. Horner is already sitting down and desperately trying to stop everyone else from babbling about the aforementioned psychosexual bullshit and just eat already. “C’mon kids!” she’s saying. “I’ve lived a long life and one thing I’ve learned is that leftover lasagna doesn’t get better as it approaches room temperature.”

Zits, 5/6/25

Zits is doing a bit this week where Jeremy and Pierce cram for their exams and it makes their heads swell up real big and I think it’s funny. Sometimes comics are just excuses to draw things that are funny to look at and that’s OK!

Shoe, 5/6/25

“Get it, because of the common saying about liars? Anyway, he’s in the hospital in critical condition, the governor is already coming up with a list of potential appointees to his seat in case he doesn’t make it.”

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Dennis the Menace, 1/14/25

Now, look, today I’m not really interested in litigating whether this is wildly non-menacing (“Aww, I need to show all the parts of my body that they’re loved, just like my parents show me they love me”) or quite menacing, actually (“If I train my body to accept arbitrary stimulus as the equivalent to human affection, eventually I will have no need for emotional contact with others”). No, I want to focus on Joey’s jaunty body language as he slurps refreshing water through his straw and watches Dennis put on socks. “Wow, so they go between your skin and your shoes, huh? I could see that having a number of positive impacts on the overall foot experience.” I’ve had my issues in the past with strip colorists so I gotta give props to whoever correctly figured out what was going on here and made sure Joey’s ankles were flesh-colored, as this is clearly the first he’s hearing about socks.

Mary Worth, 1/14/25

Mary Worth has delivered any number of outrageous and delightful word-sequences over the years, and though it’s not as flashy as some, I immediately believe that “My parents were successful pharmacists” is up there on this list. Who could’ve imagined that this town’s two top pharmacists, respected by their peers and earning a fine salary, possibly working as a team or maybe each with their own pharmacy to better provide prescription drugs and related goods and services across the region, would get divorced? And why would they do it? Probably because their son’s a huge asshole, is my guess.

Zits, 1/14/25

I haven’t always been on board with the realism of the depiction of teen behavior in this strip, but teens are fairly notoriously terrible kissers, so I’m going to have to hand it Zits for this one.

Six Chix, 1/14/25

What better way to establish how chaotic 2025 will be than choosing to “start the year” a full two weeks into January? Six Chix is doing it exactly right, something I don’t say lightly.