Comment of the Week

So ... okay, Brad's using his left hand to wash Toni's right shoulder. That makes sense. And Toni's using her left hand to ... wash Brad's left shoulder. With a second bar of exactly-the-same-size soap that's in there for some reason. Picture this (I'm sorry). Really picture this (I'm so sorry). Imagine (I'M SORRY OKAY) reaching all the way across your body to wash what is almost certainly the least dirty place on your partner's body and then transitioning, somehow, into making out. Toni almost certainly elbowed Brad in the chin before she -- okay, you know what, I'm gonna stop right there; no no, don't get up, I'll arrest myself.

els

Post Content

B.C., 6/14/12

One of the things I think is funny and interesting in B.C. (is it on purpose? let’s say it’s funny and interesting on purpose) is its mix of sentient predator and sentient prey animals, actually depicted preying on each other, as with the ants and anteaters. I find today’s strip particularly intriguing on this score. If you don’t really think about it much and accept the outside-the-anthill perspective the strip gives you, it’s a silly bit about an anteater getting his tongue tied in a knot, ho ho! But take a minute to imagine the scene inside: the gathering of innocent ants, going about their business within the larger colony, when suddenly an enormous, slimy tentacle bursts through the wall of their home, slithering to and fro. Who knows how many hundreds of unfortunates were snared by foul mucus that covers the monstrous thing and dragged back screaming into its snout, where they will be digested, alive, in agony? The carnage continues until one heroic young ant defeats the beast using the skills he’s learned in his scout group; the monster retreats in confusion, but the colony members look around their shattered home, weeping for their loved ones, wondering how they’ll be able to put their lives back together.

Mark Trail, 6/14/12

“Well, we flew close to him and tipped over his canoe and probably he fell into a fairly calm river within easy swimming distance of shore. That should take care of Mr. Trail!” Bush pilot Mike Harris is the most half-assed murderer ever. Maybe someone should check in on Al Chavez, he might turn out to not be dead after all.

Ziggy, 6/14/12

Finally, Ziggy has been proven to be genetically inferior, with science.

Post Content

Judge Parker, 6/13/12

There hasn’t been a lot of plot development or anything over the last few days in Judge Parker, but I did want to give you a good look at Sam and Avery’s hideous fishing outfits, if only to assure you that massive, unearned fortunes can’t buy taste.

Pluggers, 6/13/12

Pluggers are sneaky cheapskates who invoke their grandchildren in transparent attempts to get out of paying for things.

Spider-Man, 6/13/12

Sadly, hilariously, Clown-9’s statement in panel two is 100% accurate.

Post Content

Marmaduke, 6/12/12

Oh, Dottie! I understand the urge to you have to revel, just for a moment, in your victory over Marmaduke, to let him know that you beat him, right before you plunge the obsidian dagger into his enormous heart and send his dark soul back to the hell-dimension from which it came. But his moments of weakness are so few and so fleeting that you can’t waste time gloating. In fact, one huge eyelid is already creaking open, meaning things are about to get very bad for you very quickly.

Dennis the Menace, 6/12/12

On the other end of the “committing violence against living things on your property” spectrum, taking out your aggression on plants has to be some of the least menacing business I can think of.

Apartment 3-G, 6/12/12

It looks like the offspring Scott implanted in Nina’s body is finally ready to burst out through her chest. Guess she was right to be freaked out about this pregnancy after all!