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Gil Thorp, 6/27/23

Oh wow, it looks like the WOKE FCC won’t let America’s millions of high school sports fans hear fraught language or see a father-son relationship fall apart, with devastating emotional effects that will leave both parties wounded for years, THANKS A LOT PRESIDENT BRANDON

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 6/27/23

Good lord, I thought Snuffy knowing common French phrases was bad, but I absolutely cannot abide by Hootin’ Holler’s citizenry acting as if they all accept the germ theory of disease.

The Phantom, 6/27/23

Savarna and Wilbur: The superstar teamup we didn’t know we needed!

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Marvin, 6/26/23

“Because you said it in front of him in English, a language he absolutely speaks and understands! Yeah, I know, he’s a baby, or maybe a toddler, or maybe a four-year-old who isn’t potty trained, and sometimes he uses thought balloons and sometimes speech balloons. Nobody really can explain what’s going on. Anyway, it’s a good thing we don’t seem to be required to do a ‘joke’ of any sort here. Egg shortage ended a while ago, incidentally.”

Beetle Bailey, 6/26/23

Look, I’m as glad as anyone to say good-bye to my mid-to-late ’00s vogue for “ho ho, what if Beetle and Sarge were … FUCKING … in a kinky way” jokes, but I do appreciate that they still take the time to antagonistically flirt with one another now and then.

The Phantom, 6/26/23

Believe it or not, The Phantom is still years deep into this “the Phantom springs Savarna from prison … and the consequences may be catastrophic” storyline and I don’t feel a need to keep you updated on the details, but I do need to point out that CHHFROOSH! is a top-tier sound effect that we all need to recognize and respect.

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 6/25/23

Wait, what exactly is Snuffy buying that tool for? It’s definitely not to do any useful or productive repair work, I can guarantee that. No, the best case scenario is that he’s going to try to undercut Doc Pritchard and offer low-cost, low-skill tooth extraction services to his friends and family. The worst case scenario involves some members of the Barlow clan captured during the last clan battle, and I’d honestly rather not think about it.

Hi and Lois, 6/25/23

We may think of comics being for kids, but I’ve always felt that strips like Hi and Lois place the adults firmly in the center as the viewpoint characters and are meant to be a hopefully amusing mirror for middle-class grownups. Sometimes they’re even aspirational! Take this strip, for instance: if you’re a parent with kids in Little League who has dreamed of being officially banned from their children’s games so they have a legally binding excuse to not come anymore, today you get a glimpse of someone who actually makes that happen.