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Hey, everyone, new comics soon-ish, but here’s a couple of things that I’ve been meaning to link to.

• Gil Thorp aficionados are all well aware of faithful reader Jason Beattie’s This Week In Milford blog. Polls are now open there for best panels of 2007! All your favorites from last year are there — self-clubbing Tyler! Gail Martin! Gil orders a hit! If these are the best, I’m really looking forward to seeing the worst.
• Speaking of single-strip blogs, a few weeks ago faithful reader Dan sent me a link to his effort, Understanding Judge Parker. It might be better titled “Creating Fascinating But Inscrutable Art By Combining Judge Parker With Other Comics”, but it’s still pretty great!
• UPDATE: I almost forgot, I got the following e-mail the other day from Clifford Meth: “I am helping [recently deceased comic book artist] Dave Cockrum’s widow Paty sell off Dave’s personal comics collection — Golden and Silver Age books, his X-Men file copies, etc. Please be kind enough to mention this at your blog and share the news with others.” Done! Check out the details.

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 1/8/08

The current Rex Morgan plotline got exciting some weeks back and, as is ever the case when that happens, I immediately lost interest. I discussed this phenomenon, which I call The Rex Morgan Problem, a while back, and here it comes around again just like clockwork. I think part of the problem is that “exciting” is really not something these strips do well. Ludicrous? Overwrought? Brimming with unspoken and petty resentments? Cryptohomoerotic? Yes, yes, yes, and you’d better believe that’s a yes. Exciting? Not so much.

Anyway, speaking of unspoken resentments, I do kind of love Niki’s expression in panel three. To quickly sum up several weeks of ostensibly exciting developments, Niki was briefly left alone in the cabin with one the escaped prisoners, who tried to relate to him as a fellow lowlife and offered him some stolen cash to switch sides; Niki refused because of his fear of letting Rex down. In today’s final panel, he looks to be contemplating the fact that right now he could be (a) warm, (b) dry, (c) rich, and (d) about to be embarking on an awesome cross-country crime spree instead of trudging through the dark, wet woods with a sullen and vaguely creepy doctor.

Spider-Man, 1/8/08

Speaking of non-exciting “excitement,” Spider-Man has actually toyed with superhero-on-villain action for the past few days. I refuse to label the Persuader a “supervillain” despite his descriptive one-word name, because he wears street clothes and his only “power” is his unusual stature; still, he’s proved more than a match for Spidey, escaping from his spiderwebs and failing to get in the way of the web-slinger’s wildly misdirected web-slinging. Maybe it’s time to admit that Peter Parker’s longstanding refusal to fight crime or even get off of the couch comes not from laziness or apathy but of a crippling fear of exactly this sort of inevitable failure and humiliation. The self-esteem issues that would naturally arise go a long way towards explaining his eternal passive-aggressive attitude towards any hint of his wife’s success.

Dennis the Menace, 1/8/08

The teacher in green’s wide, crazy eyes are more terrifyingly menacing than anything Dennis has done in my lifetime. She looks like she’s about to go on a killing spree, and, even more troubling, that she’ll testify that Dennis’ fairly tame caricature spoke to her and told her which of her students should live and which should die.

Gil Thorp, 1/8/08

“Frankly, it smacks of math. And the last thing I want my players wasting their time with is math. That’s why we have the poindexters who sit at the scorer’s table!”

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Well, Keg of Curd has had a good 18-day run, but it’s finally time to crown a new comment of the week!

“Having moved as far as possible from menace, Dennis is now distancing himself from making sense, giving us this baffling nugget of Family Circus-grade confusion. Snowballs are free? Compared to what? Other roughly palm-sized objects that you throw at people?” –Rhekarid

And the runners-up! So funny!

“You know, I’ve been thinking about this recent Mark Trail storyline, and how the ‘small cigars’ played a major part. I just wish that there existed some diminutive by which we could refer to these small cigars … perhaps ‘cigar-ling’ … or ‘cigar-ina’ … or possibly even ‘cigar-ette.'” –Mariko

“Has anyone noticed the FOOB website is down? Did it collapse under the weight of its own desperation?” –Mir777

“I always appreciate the Kwanzaa story for both the insanity and of course the life lesson. While I’m absolutely amazed by the insanity of this year’s gem, I’m relatively certain that the lesson — don’t leave your pregnant buffalo-wife alone after stealing from a two-headed snake — doesn’t apply to most people.” –rhymes with puck

“Damn you, April. Damn you for having what I want: bangs tousled just so by the awkward breath of teenage angst, trying to guilt you into awkward sex.” –kitty

“Does Margo seriously believe people drink champagne to quench thirst? I think this might explain something about her.” –fluffy

“‘And after champagne, who’s going to the chiropractor after screwing up their neck?’ ‘I AM!'” –Fireball

“So Eric’s leaving for China, leaving his gallery in the hands of a manager with a single day of training and a short attention span, plus a guy who’s probably in the supply closet right now, huffing paint fumes and airplane glue. My guess is that the gallery has been hemorrhaging money and this is a convoluted plan to collect a surprisingly large insurance settlement.” –Darkefang

“I can buy that Lu Ann in hypoxia paints better than Alan drunk off his ass, but I think that’s more than balanced out by the fact that, sober or drunken, Alan can think in sentences and count money and stuff. True love waits!” –Dr Marion

“Abbey’s blacked-out face is a visual representation of her state of mind before what she’s come to refer to in her own mind as simply ‘it.'” –Nate

“I hate long goodbyes … therefore, our imminent lovemaking will be confused, frenzied, and brief.” –Hubris

[In response to Hubris’s comment above]: “Also known as ‘doin’ it Gil Thorp style.'” –Artist formerly known as Ben

“I wish tomorrow’s panel would feature Slylock and Cassandra, sharing the bath and a Max sandwich. And I don’t mean the threesome type. I mean the really slice up the little bastard and eat him type.” –McManx

“I think Reeky Rat perfectly symbolizes man’s insatiable desire for self-betterment. Clearly he’s fighting an unwinnable war against his own revolting stench, but there he is, in the shower, trying to scrub off the repugnant hand life has dealt him and give himself the chance to ascend to a higher stratus of society, albeit through a life of crime, deception, and ill-fated schemery. ‘Get me a towel!’ he shouts jubilantly, ‘Everything’s comin’ up Reeky!'” –Stupendous Girl

“You know, I really wish FBOFW would spend some time letting us know how the characters feel about the way their lives change over time and to do so with either long, drawn-out exposition or with short, witty zingers to which we may or may not be able to relate.” –PeteMoss

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