Post Content

Curtis, 6/12/05

We’ve of course seen plenty of egregiously unhip fake “rapper” names used in Curtis, but I believe this is the first instance of egregiously unhip fake “rap” lyrics. Let’s take a moment to savor them, shall we?

Den ah snuffed ‘im!
I snuffed ‘im! Woo!
He looked at me wrong,
so ah snuffed ‘im!

Yeah! Woo! I put quotation marks around “rap,” of course, as an homage to Curtis’ tendency to put quotation marks around “rap,” along with almost anything else, including, in this strip, “complaints” and “Bullet-Wound’s” (and what’s with the hyphen? Is he an 18th century rapper or something?). Bizarrely, the word “spanker” in panel four is left unquoted.

The question that really gets me in this strip, though, is: how old is Barry supposed to be, anyway? I mean, Curtis may be about three years too young to be listening to the ultraviolent stylings of Bullet-Wound and Fortyounce and what have you, but I have Barry pegged at about three years too old to be shouting “yay” at the choo-choos and the teddy bear town and all that sugary crap. And incidentally, the top two panels of this strip were cut off by my paper, so I was severely traumatized when I downloaded this strip and actually saw Charlie Chipmunk in the flesh. If I had a little brother who insisted on watching this, I might have a very strong urge to, well, snuff ‘im.

Post Content

Family Circus, 6/11/05

This is the sort of trash you’re going to encounter if you insist on bringing your precious little angel onto public transportation instead of safely strapping her into her car seat in the back of your SUV as you shuttle her from strip mall to strip mall in your pristine, tattooed-hippie-free suburb. I mean, look at this guy! The tattoos are bad enough, of course, but check out the mushy red worker’s cap — he’s probably in the Wobblies or something. And his hair would almost be long enough to touch his collar — if he had a collar, which he doesn’t. Freak.

Why are Mommy and Dolly on the bus with all the ghetto puds, anyway? And why is Dolly wearing that weirdly matronly dress? Maybe Daddy got drunk and obnoxious one time too many, and Mommy grabbed her only girl-child, wrapped her up in the first thing she could find, and headed to the Greyhound station looking for a new life. Why, Mr. Magic Markers could be her new best friend! I bet he’d learn little miss mouthy some manners real quick.

Post Content

Get Fuzzy, 6/12/05

I spend so much time raging against suck here that it’s good for the soul to stop and contemplate a strip that I like once in a while. This isn’t even a particular standout of the Get Fuzzy oeuvre, but there’s much about it to like: the way the top of Rob’s head and tip of his finger just barely protrude out of the frame of the first panel, or Satchel’s varying and funny but completely recognizably dog-life facial expressions (which include his ears — the most important part of a dog’s “face”). But what caught my eye here is a silly but very in-character touch: Satchel dots his i’s with hearts, like a twelve-year-old girl. If Bucky could write, one wonders what he’d dot his i’s with — a skull and crossbones, perhaps?