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Mary Worth, 10/27/21

I hate to ever use the phrase “I would respect Wilbur more” so let’s just say that I would respect Wilbur a very small albeit still measurable amount more if he actually used iMovie or something to create a slideshow of his favorite Estelle pics with “their song” (which, lest you forget, is about a couple in a long-term committed relationship who both plan to cheat and ended up connecting with each other via a personal ad, and this turns them on) as soundtrack for him to watch while he tries to get in touch with his true emotional state. Wilbur is something of a tech whiz, having once tried and failed to get Mary into social media, but I still assume this is just Estelle’s Facebook profile pic expanded to full screen (she hasn’t blocked him yet) and the music is coming from his beloved shower radio, which he’s propped up behind his laptop.

Six Chix, 10/27/21

“Turns out he said ‘trick or treat,’ which obviously makes more sense in context, and now I’ve freaked him out. Why am I like this?”

Hi and Lois, 10/27/21

Hi and Lois is an old-fashioned strip that unashamedly embraces old-fashioned values. That’s why the title characters’ teenage son still refers to their neighbor as “Mister,” even when he’s passed out drunk in their living room.

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Dennis the Menace, 10/26/21

[sputtering indignantly] Martha! You completely misunderstand me! Why, I wasn’t planning on slipping this loathsome tyke a handful of barbiturates, hoping he would swallow them and quickly slip into a coma or worse! I need them for me! This is one visit from the lad too many and I’m hoping for the sweet release of death myself! Strange that you’ve lived with me for so many years but it’s as if you don’t even know me at all!

Dick Tracy, 10/26/21

Oh, so, over in Dick Tracy Diet Smith’s Time Drone exploded upon its return from a trip to the past, destroying his HQ and killing several people, and now people are mad about it. Kind of wild that this guy invented a machine capable of travelling to the past, potentially altering the fabric of the space-time continuum and also eliminating all human privacy forever, and nobody seemed to care much, but if blow up one building you get a bunch of people outside your house with signs that say “BAN TIME TRAVEL.” Hey guys, I’m pretty sure they were building bombs in that building that blew up too, just putting that out there, if you’re looking for stuff to ban!

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/25/21

Do … do the good folks of Hootin’ Holler not know about air conditioning? The low-key single most important invention of the 20th century, which transformed the demographic geography of the United States? Do they not know that people are now free to move where they will in pursuit of good jobs, safe in the knowledge that they’ll be at least somewhat physically comfortable when they get there, working in factories or offices that would’ve simply been uninhabitable before the advent of artificial cooling? Do they not know they can leave?

Hi and Lois, 10/25/21

I really appreciate how wide-eyed Hi is with wonder in the second panel here. “Lois! I can’t feel them! I can’t feel anything! Now, what if there a way to do this … with my emotions.”

Judge Parker, 10/25/21

If Abbey gently resting her fingertips against her temple and muttering “I just can’t take it anymore, Sam” is coping, imagine what failing to cope would look like.