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Shoe, 11/13/20

I’m honestly not exactly sure, but I’m assuming the punchline here is that the mayor is not, in fact, living the high life thanks to thrift and good financial planning? Usually when Shoe does a joke about a comically corrupt politician, the strip deploys Senator Batson Belfry, but since senators pull down six figures, I guess he wouldn’t really work for the joke. But look: do you really believe that Treetops, a town that isn’t exactly Hootin’ Holler but is definitely depicted as having seen better days, somehow has enough opportunities for graft that its mayor can “live like a multi-millionaire”? I mean, the Perfesser is at this official city government press conference sitting on a crate, and I assume he brought it in from home.

The Lockhorns, 11/13/20

It can be difficult to ascertain the full social context of any given scene in the Mostly Featureless Lockhorns Void, but it really seems like nobody else is as this “party” and that Leroy went to the trouble of getting party hats and a cake just to give Loretta this cruel card. I like that he’s stepped a few feet away from her as she reads it, to be sure that he’s fully out of her emotional penumbra as the message really hits home.

Anyway, what do you guys think is going on over at Pluggers? I’ve gotten over that whole chicken leg business, probably they aren’t dabbling in body horror anym–

Pluggers, 11/13/20

AAAHHH

AAAAAHHHH

AAAAAHHHHH

WHAT IS THAT

WHAT’s GOING ON

This can’t be right, right? This has to be some weird Pluggers man-animal chimera nightmare bullshit. I’m just gonna Google Image search “rhino teeth” and s–

JESUS CHRIST, this is even worse, what the fuck am I even looking at, that can’t be right, keep scrolling through the images, there has to b–

NOOO I HATE IT I HATE ALL OF IT WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING

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Dick Tracy, 11/12/20

Ah, it appears this meteorite heist is not meant to provide an illicit space-rock as a trophy for some wealthy malcontent trawling the dark web eager for a forbidden object to show off to his friends; rather, Yeti and Daisy are just going to extract its valuable mineral content in order to cover their not inconsiderable expenses. In a way, it fits in with Yeti’s whole deal, which is that he’s a poisoner in a fallen world, where nobody likes to poison people to death anymore. I’m sure he’ll sigh wistfully as he watches the meteorite melt away, thinking of its long journey through space and the sort of wealthy supercriminal who in a better era might have enjoyed giving it a place of honor in the trophy room in his mega-yacht or undersea lair. Then he’ll shake his head, pick up his phone, and make contact with the multinational metallurgical conglomerate he’s going to sell the minerals to via a Cayman Islands shell corporation.

Hi and Lois, 11/12/20

So the joke here is “Ha ha, turns out Hi and Thirsty waxed horny within earshot of the kids,” but my favorite thing is that Hi is already wearing a dull, gobsmacked expression before we even get to this revelation. It’s like he’s still processing the idea that Chip might want to go golfing with him. “Chip? On the golf course? With me? But … the golf course is where I go to not see Chip.”

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Dick Tracy, 11/11/20

I gotta tell you, I’ve been extremely uninterested in this Dick Tracy plot so far, which has involved … poison gas? A couple new weirdo criminals (“Daisy” and “Yeti”) whose gimmicks don’t really seem to sync up? Enh. But I am a fickle Comics Curmudgeon, faithful readers, and everything about today’s strip delights me. The sudden pivot to meteorite theft? The idea that there’s some kind of lucrative black market for meteorites out there? The managing editor at the The Daily deciding that there should be a front page banner headline about a new meteorite exhibit at the museum, and that the approximate dollar value of the meteorite is the most important thing to emphasize in said banner headline? The gratuitious slam on Daisy’s literacy? It’s all perfect and delightful, and I hope for more of this and less of the stuff that I already can’t really remember very clearly and cannot be bothered to go read again to make sure I got the details right in this post.

Gil Thorp, 11/11/20

Gil Thorp, meanwhile, has finally reached that all-important point in every storyline where Gil can no longer ignore the increasingly dumb antics that his student-athletes have gotten up to so far this semester. Today’s he’s decided to deal with the current set of problem children by yelling at them and, you know what? Fair.