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Family Circus, 8/8/25

The whole gimmick of “NOT ME” is that the Keane Kids say “not me!” when confronted with naughty things that they have, in fact, done. Depicting him as an actual ghost-demon tormenting Big Daddy Keane while all four of the kids are fully visible and doing other things is 100% evidence that somehow the Family Circus has, against all odds, lost the plot.

Mary Worth, 8/8/25

You might recall that the climax of the original Olive story was that Mary saved the lass from drowning, and she’s frankly been chasing that high ever since. Olive may have since taken swimming lessons, but panel two has made it clear that Mary has been Googling “new york area beaches with rip currents” because she knows she needs to up her game.

B.C., 8/8/25

Big Monogamy has clearly decided that the best way to keep polyamory out of the mainstream is by messaging in syndicated newspaper comic strips, so, uh, I guess get used to keeping track of your various partners in an elaborate Google Docs spreadsheet, everybody!

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Gil Thorp, 7/28/25

There are two types of Gil Thorp summers: the wacky ones, with plotlines like “Kaz punches his way to a bodyguard job for the Rock ‘n’ Roll Carole King” or “Gil gets involved with a pro wrestler who might have dementia or that might just be his latest angle” or “a sadistic warden forces juvenile delinquents to battle each other on the gridiron for their freedom,” and the boring ones, like “let’s just get a head start on football season or whatever.” Obviously you know which kind I prefer, and while it’s early yet, I do think “Coach Ex Mrs. Coach Thorp takes their son to Berlin, where he’s vlogging mean stuff about his sibling while dressed like one of the guys from The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou for some reason” has potential. Who is he vlogging at, by the way? Where’s the camera? Are we holding the camera? In some high-end French literary theory sense, are we the camera?

Dick Tracy, 7/28/25

Look, when you come to the conference room to present the evidence you’ve been gathering on the latest case to Dick Tracy, you’d best come correct, and by “correct” I mean “with the logo of the company or government agency you’ve been assigned to investigate printed, in color, on the manila envelope you use to hold the documents you’ve compiled about said company or government agency.”

B.C., 7/28/25

You’d think that when the POV “camera” pulls back to give you a wider view of the gym in the final panel, you’d see a pull-up bar, to reinforce the punchline. You’d be wrong, though! It’s hard to draw a pull-up bar outside, honestly, so these weights are going to have to do.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/28/25

“So you’re saying you’re not very observant and are pretty easy to trick, huh? Interesting. Just filing that away. Might be useful information at some point.”

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Archie, 5/22/25

I dunno, Jughead, that looks more like blood to me. Presumably the LORD will be passing through to smite all those who harbor Archie in their house, and Mr. Lodge is making it clear that He should pass over the Lodge mansion, as it is Archie-free. Bad luck for Archie’s parents, I guess.

Dick Tracy, 5/22/25

“Dick Tracy” is kind of a funny name, but I think that if the comic strip didn’t exist and you were introduced to someone by that name, it wouldn’t cause you to pause and repeat it back with an “um” before it, like you think it’s weird. Especially if your name is “Icarus Lovejoy”! C’mon, man! Icarus Lovejoy!

B.C., 5/22/25

I can’t believe Johnny Hart’s heirs have allowed mention of the metric system in his beloved comic strip. I don’t care if you need to use “meter” to make the Fast and Furious wordplay work! We all know the metric system is the thin edge of the wedge of tyrannical one-world government and must be stopped at all costs.