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Archive: Barney Google & Snuffy Smith

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Mostly thowaways

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Panels from Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/28/24

Remember the “30-50 feral hogs” guys? He briefly amused Twitter in 2019 when he demanded to know how he could protect his children from the aforementioned quantity of swine if he didn’t have access to an automatic weapon for personal use, but then we all learned that feral hogs are a real problem and that he might’ve had a point. Today we find out that the bears are learning to use the feral hogs as weapons, which shows that our whole reliance on firearms is obsolete. Only a good guy with a feral hog can stop a bad guy with a feral hog! (The bad guy is a bear in this scenario.)

Panel from Dennis the Menace, 4/28/24

Hey, kids, did you know that the “Diners Club” card was the very first credit card? No, of course not, because you’re not a million years old and Diners Club was long ago outcompeted into a tiny niche by Visa and Mastercard. Today’s Dennis the Menace (the joke is about going out to dinner, don’t worry about it) is the beginning of a great new partnership, which will help educate children and young people about the Diners Club brand! Money well spent, I say.

Mary Worth, 4/28/24

Mostly I wanted to show you today’s Mary Worth throwaway panels so you could see Iris with heart eyes, inflamed with lust by Wilbur’s display of casual violence. But as part of my duty of keeping you up to date on the comics, I must also point out that Wilbur actually saved that old man from a careening car rather than hurling him into its path. Wilbur just keeps winning! I personally am not a fan.

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From hell’s heart, I stab at thee

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Gil Thorp, 4/27/24

I’m not sure what the current consensus on how to win over the teenage kids of the divorced dad you’re currently fucking, but bribing them with video games and comics strikes me as pretty good. Kind of dubious that Dick Tracy should be the go-to comic here, but it seems to have worked, so I guess she did her research.

Mary Worth, 4/27/24

Can you imagine getting reduced to a bloody smear on the asphalt by an SUV while you’re screaming obscenities at Wilbur Weston? Can you imagine that the last thing you think or feel is a boundless, seething contempt for this man, a contempt that occupies you so completely that you don’t even notice the car vrrooming towards you? I can. Frankly this has now rocketed to the very top of the list of ways I want to go out.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/27/24

Close, Snuffy! Given the rustic setting, the real way to bamboozle those effette urban dwellers is to market this junk pile as outsider art.

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Saturday is for the children

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Hi and Lois, 4/13/24

Two things you have to keep in mind when reading today’s Hi and Lois: (a) despite my many jokes about how Trixie is an eternal baby who’s been an infant for 70 years now, we have to understand that, in the world of the strip, she’s actually less than a year old, and (b) the Flagston family dog is named Dawg. Which means that at some point, possibly quite recently, these kids decided to name their baseball team after the dog, but now that there’s something new and exciting on the scene in terms of cute nonverbal family members, they’re willing to just throw out their old name and take on a new one. It makes me sick and I’m just glad Dawg’s not here to see it.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/13/24

Children have long been expected to contribute economically to their households at a pretty young age, particularly in poorer, developing societies. The real unnerving thing here is not that Jughaid’s trying to help pay his way, but the question of where, in a town whose economy is entirely based on criminality, he got the money.

Daddy Daze, 4/13/24

OK, fine, I laughed at this. See, the joke is that the Daddy Daze baby isn’t potty trained, so he doesn’t really see the point of the toilet. He can just poop whenever and wherever he wants, he doesn’t need a special piece of furniture for it! If Marvin tried to pull this off, I’d be furious, but Daddy Daze doesn’t go to the poop joke well too often so I’ll allow it.