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Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/9/13

Pluggers: Origins

Spider-Man, 8/9/13

At last, the Tarantula has arrived! And he’s right — it’s always a comedown for Spider-Man when a real superhero shows up.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/9/13

Oh gosh: not only is Ginny being forced to wed the least-desirable feller in Hootin’ Holler, but he expects an arch-conservative marriage including wifely submission. Everyone who has ever met a Hootin’ Holler feller — or gal — finds this hilarious.

Momma, 8/9/13

Francis got promoted to “Dirt”! Those years spent toiling as “Assistant Dirt” really paid off!

Mary Worth, 8/9/13

Adding Mary Worth to your “sharing circle” is like inviting a wolf pack to your all-you-can-eat buffet.

— Uncle Lumpy

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Sally Forth, 8/8/13

Aw — seems like just yesterday she was a cute little fifth-grader, and here she is ruining her first summer romance with a pointless, self-destructive neurotic meltdown. Little Hilary, all grown up!

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/8/13

Wait! Tell us more about this “Charlie” player, cutting a wide swath through the maidens of Hootin’ Holler with his smooth talk, fancy ring, and bait-and-switch mating strategy. Is he unaware of the role played by firearms in his community’s courtship rituals?

Or perhaps Hootin’ Holler’s ancestral wimminfolk cobbled together their own ritual from scraps of Sadie Hawkins Day and Musical Chairs, in which eligible wimmin pass the ring down from one to another as one by one they wed, until at last the final maiden is doomed to wear it as she weds the Final Feller — the Feller No One Wants.

Yes, that must be it, judging from the look of shock, horror, and despair on Ginny’s face — it’s exactly how Loweezy looked wearing the ring at her own weddin’ a generation ago.

Mary Worth, 8/8/13

Swimming! Hiking! Stretching! A life of petty intrusiveness requires constant discipline. Not for the weak!

Herb and Jamaal, 8/8/13

Jamaal lives every day as though it were his last, and reeks so bad everyone around him wishes it were theirs.

— Uncle Lumpy

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Panel from Slylock Fox, 7/28/13

Boy, Slylock is sure getting all Judgment of Solomon down at the trailer park today! You don’t even need to read the solution (it involves trying to assess the cream soda’s fizziness levels) to see the contempt he holds everyone in here. After all, whether the delicious soda rightfully belongs to Reeky or to Mrs. Beaver, Slylock is going to pop it open and ruin anyone’s chance of enjoying it on their terms. Presumably he’ll just roughly thrust it at whoever’s it turns out to be, saying “Drink it quick if you don’t want it to go flat.” Or maybe he’ll just gulp the whole thing down himself, as repayment for having to come down and sort this nonsense out in the first place.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/28/13

If there’s one aspect of life in Hootin’ Holler that I don’t think gets enough treatment, it’s the system of clan-based feuds that inevitably springs up in places where the nation-state’s justice system is weak, nonexistent, or distrusted. What deadly slights do those marks on the tree represent? How many generations of Smifs have been recording them against how many generations of Barlows? Is there any way to wipe the slate clean, except with Barlow blood?

Panels from Marvin, 7/28/13

For a while now the Marvin Sunday panel has consisted of Marvin’s entire family staring straight ahead in numb, wide-eyed despair, which as you can imagine has pleased me to no end. Today, however, Grandpa offers a specific complaint, which I like less, as I prefer to think of them having reached this state merely by contemplation of their own hellish existence.