Archive: Beetle Bailey

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Mary Worth, 11/1/24

Aww, who came to Dr. Ed and Estelle’s last-minute, let’s-make-it-legal-before-we-have-another-dumb-fight wedding? Well, from right, we have: Saul and Eve (intense dog owners, probably repeat customers at Dr. Ed’s clinic due to obsessive worrying over their pets’ health), Dr. Ed’s former lover Shiela, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz (officiant), Mary, some guy (maybe supposed to be Dr. Jeff except his temples aren’t grey and also his nose and chin look wrong???), and, of course, Wilbur, making his second appearance at an ex’s wedding in as many years. It’s good that this is happening to him! I think he should continue to suffer further humiliation until he’s learned his lesson (he never will). Maybe he’ll get an invite from Fabiana when she finally marries her cousin, dare to dream!

Crock, 11/1/24

I dunno, maybe I’m reading too much into a kind of nothing joke, but I feel like at least a little of the implication here is that the wife is going to be eating this dinner too, right? “Don’t eat the dinner, honey … the dinner is me … the dinner is me” (she’ll never hear it because nobody listens to their voice mail anymore, haha kids today am I right)

Beetle Bailey, 11/1/24

“Do the creators of Beetle Bailey know what ‘puppy play’ is?” is the sort of question that I will never, ever want to actually learn the answer to but also will never, ever be able to stop thinking about.

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Gil Thorp, 10/22/24

Oh hey, remember the new guys introduced this year on the Mudlark football team? Well, I forgot to mention that one of them has this running bit where he says “yeet” all the time, not in a sentence or anything, just as a general exclamation. I’m actually kind of torn on how realistic that is, because it’s true that teenagers are generally goofy idiots who will repeatedly say a word they think is funny with no context, but also shouldn’t these guys be young enough to just think of “yeet” as a regular word? It’s a verb that means to hurl something away with great force, if you don’t know, although the Merriam-Webster Dictionary website says it also could be an interjection “used to express surprise, approval, or excited enthusiasm,” and if you can’t trust the dictionary about the sort of things teens say, who can you trust?

Beetle Bailey, 10/22/24

Julius, General Halftrack’s driver, is a character who doesn’t show up much in this strip — one of the only times I’ve ever name-checked him was in a 2004 post about Sarge having a gay panic dream, where both the comic and the post are something of a time capsule at this point — but I appreciate the nice, good look we’re getting at his extremely grim facial expression here. Not sure where the smart money was going on which of the Camp Swampy guys was going to Full Metal Jacket the place, but I know where it’s going now!

Blondie, 10/22/24

Hey guys, let’s check in on Blondie! The joke in today’s Blondie is that Dagwood is very depressed.

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Beetle Bailey, 10/18/24

This Beetle Bailey honestly feels kind of grim to me, as banal as it seems on the surface. Sure, Sarge is joking around with Beetle in a way that alludes, in a vaguely threatening manner, to the power he holds over his subordinates, as is his wont, but he’s not glowering or even looking up from his paperwork to make eye contact as he does it. Instead, he’s efficiently taking care of some of his less glamorous duties as a non-commissioned officer and not getting overly emotionally involved in Beetle’s day-to-day life. Maybe all the work he did with Dr. Bonkus on his anger issues finally paid off.

Hi and Lois, 10/18/24

Sorry, Trixie! You’re damned to eternal infancy, and while your baby’s brain may somehow generate adult-level cognition, you will never develop even rudimentary speech capabilities. That means you can’t engage in sophisticated bargaining with your brother in scenarios like this. Thought balloons won’t cut it!

Hagar the Horrible, 10/18/24

Uhhh, no? Because it’s facing the other way? And because of gravity? Idiot.