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Curtis, 3/9/06

It’s hard to see in that last panel, but for breakfast Curtis is having some … Rapper Puffs!

Isn’t that funny? Like, a rapper-themed cereal? Do the pieces look like … turntables, or … um, big clocks you’d wear around your neck, like Flavor Flav, or … wait, microphones and turntables for MCs or DJs?

Or maybe, like, guns and crap. “Icey-s,” whatever the frick those are. Hell, I don’t know.

Hey, the mascot could be Puff Daddy! You know … Puff Daddy … Rapper Puffs…

Wait, he’s just “Diddy” now, isn’t he? Dammit. I got nothing. Instead, I’m just going to link to a bunch of funny stuff that showed up in the comments, for those of you who don’t read the comments:

• brucker has proved, with a little deft editing, that it is possible to make the current Rex Morgan storyline gayer: check out “Brokeback Hospital,” parts one, two, and three.
• If you’d like to try your hand at this, Scott has created a Flash-based Brokeback Hospital game where you can try to make Rex as gay as he can be.
• Wednesday’s pinball-playing fish inspired Irina to compose a fishy spoof of the Who’s “Pinball Wizard,” which I posted over at the forum, the better to preserve it for posterity (hope you don’t mind, Irina).

Also, faithful reader loudfan‘s now-infamous Mary Worth-“My Humps” mashup has earned her worldwide fame. Hopefully she will not be sued by the combined lawyers of King Features and the Black Eyed Peas.

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Luann, 2/17/06

Curtis, 2/17/06

Ladies and gentlemen, here on the last day of this Valentine’s Week (yes, it’s a whole week now, didn’t you get the memo from Hallmark and Cathy?), we have a battle royale between two comics love stories that just … won’t … end!

In this corner, in black and white, we have the eternal Brad-Toni-Dirk triangle. See the teasing! The sullen glares! The violation of restraining orders! The gratuitous use of the word “Chunkboy!”

And in this corner, in living color, we have the latest chapter in the Curtis-Michelle love-hate dipole. See what happens when the boy who can’t say “no” meets the girl who won’t say “yes”!

I think we have to acknowledge Curtis as the clear winner here. I’m getting real sick of Toni’s coy little sidelong glances and unnaturally pouty lips. From an artistic point of view, she’s got nothing on Michelle’s hilariously disgusted facial expression in panel three: eyes bugged out, lips curled in disdain, sweat balls flying, motion lines tracking her escape route and a well-placed elbow ready to jab her wannabe paramour in the throat if it comes to that. And while Brad’s wide-eyed, dot-mouthed horror in panel three of Luann is evocative of his new awareness of his own romantic ineptitude, it doesn’t convey bleakness the way Curtis’ lonely, underdressed blizzard trek does. Mostly, though, this Curtis promises to at least end the Michelle nonsense for a few weeks, whereas I have a sinking feeling that the Brad romantic hijinks will continue on indefinitely.

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Curtis, 1/9/06

Are Curtis‘s Kwanzaa storylines loopy, meandering, and incomprehensible? Yes. Do they generally last for days or sometimes weeks after January 1, the actual end of the holiday? Yes. Do they almost always take place in some sort of pre-modern Africa, despite the fact that the holiday was developed specifically for African-Americans in the 20th century? Do the storylines generally speaking fail to dovetail with any of Kwanzaa’s principles? Yes and yes.

On the other hand: do these Kwanzaa stories provide Curtis with an opportunity, generally lacking in this strip, to depict frickin’ awesome bat-winged bear beasts? That is a definite, hearty yes. Rock on, bat-winged Kwanzaa bear, rock on.