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Pluggers, 1/26/25

It’s interesting that the caption tells us that “pluggers know when they are ready for an upgrade” when the older dog-man very clearly does not know that it’s time for him to update his hearing aids. The implication casts him outside the bounds of the plugger community, which is chilling: is the age of the Boomer pluggers ending, and the era of Gen X pluggerdom, its hour come round at last, slouching towards the Pluggers HQ P.O. Box to be born? This new generation is represented by the younger dog man here, and yeah, I know these characters all have names, but I’ve been blogging about this damn strip for 18 years and I haven’t learned them yet and I’m simply not going to. I mean, let’s be real, that plugger dog-man is in his 50s, he’s got hearing aids, he’s annoyed by his elders, he’s me. That’s me there, the younger plugger dog-man. I don’t need to know his name. Anyway, I guess they’re out here in the snow because he’s going to put the older dog-man on an ice floe and then walk away.

Dennis the Menace, 1/26/25

I actually find today’s Dennis the Menace kind of charming — not, I feel I need to be clear after writing that last paragraph, because I find it relatable, I have no “plugger”-style problem in that department, thanks. I just like two specific panels: the one where Mr. Wilson emits one of his trademark beads of sweat as he announces the lack of bran cereal, as he is all too aware of the stakes here; and the one where Mrs. Wilson leans down to whisper “it keeps him moving” to Dennis, as if he has any idea what that’s supposed to mean. He’s five years old and not very bright, Martha! You gotta actually say the word “poop” if you expect him to follow what’s going on here!

Mary Worth, 1/26/25

Look, obviously Dirk is an asshole and a creep. But what about Jared, who took up his girlfriend’s idea about doing a photoshoot and immediately turned it into an opportunity for Star Wars cosplay? Isn’t that just as bad? No, obviously not. But it’s not good.

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Blondie, 1/20/25

The joke here really ought to be that we all know that there are plenty of cereal varieties with marshmallows out there sold in boxes with colorful cartoon art on them, but Dagwood simply doesn’t encounter them anymore, because he’s an adult, plus (and this is where Blondie’s carefully neutral “Oh?” comes in) he doesn’t actually do the grocery shopping so he assumes that because he doesn’t see them, they don’t exist. But given Dagwood’s appetites and predilections, I find it very hard to believe that he doesn’t go to the grocery store daily, wandering the aisles in a sort of dazed mania. Anyway, I do like the box of adult cereal here, which features a picture of a boring middle aged guy with a blank facial expression eating cereal on it. You can almost hear him saying the popular catchphrase, “I am eating this cereal for breakfast, as an adult.”

Shoe, 1/20/25

I’m really liking the Perfesser’s goggle eyes of horror here. Sorry, buddy! You are not excused from single combat with Biz in the rough and tumble marketplace of ideas!

Mary Worth, 1/20/25

Wow, Dawn’s already learned about negging from Dirk, and now the lessons have moved on to gaslighting! Truly a wondrous journey of discovery awaits her.

Dennis the Menace, 1/20/25

Well, I mean, he’s celebrating this birthday and the only people at his “party” are his wife and the five-year-old neighbor kid who he fucking hates, so, yeah, I think the thrill of living is gone for Mr. Wilson generally, Dennis.

Family Circus, 1/20/25

OK, Thel, before you answer this, think carefully: has the children’s religious education to date covered Exodus 22:18?

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Dennis the Menace, 1/14/25

Now, look, today I’m not really interested in litigating whether this is wildly non-menacing (“Aww, I need to show all the parts of my body that they’re loved, just like my parents show me they love me”) or quite menacing, actually (“If I train my body to accept arbitrary stimulus as the equivalent to human affection, eventually I will have no need for emotional contact with others”). No, I want to focus on Joey’s jaunty body language as he slurps refreshing water through his straw and watches Dennis put on socks. “Wow, so they go between your skin and your shoes, huh? I could see that having a number of positive impacts on the overall foot experience.” I’ve had my issues in the past with strip colorists so I gotta give props to whoever correctly figured out what was going on here and made sure Joey’s ankles were flesh-colored, as this is clearly the first he’s hearing about socks.

Mary Worth, 1/14/25

Mary Worth has delivered any number of outrageous and delightful word-sequences over the years, and though it’s not as flashy as some, I immediately believe that “My parents were successful pharmacists” is up there on this list. Who could’ve imagined that this town’s two top pharmacists, respected by their peers and earning a fine salary, possibly working as a team or maybe each with their own pharmacy to better provide prescription drugs and related goods and services across the region, would get divorced? And why would they do it? Probably because their son’s a huge asshole, is my guess.

Zits, 1/14/25

I haven’t always been on board with the realism of the depiction of teen behavior in this strip, but teens are fairly notoriously terrible kissers, so I’m going to have to hand it Zits for this one.

Six Chix, 1/14/25

What better way to establish how chaotic 2025 will be than choosing to “start the year” a full two weeks into January? Six Chix is doing it exactly right, something I don’t say lightly.