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Mary Worth, 4/29/26

I was briefly excited that this Mary Worth storyline was going to end with Mary and Toby enjoying a self-congratulatory spa trip rather than Mary and Dr. Jeff enjoying a self-congratulatory dinner date and boat ride, but then I realized that probably we’re going to get a self-congratulatory spa trip followed by a self-congratulatory dinner date and boat ride during which Mary relays to Jeff an excruciatingly detailed recap of both the storyline that’s just wrapped up and the spa trip.

Dick Tracy, 4/29/26

Look, I’m open minded, I cheerfully accepted “Dick Tracy is canonically aware of the existence of furries,” but, hmm, “Mumbles, the iconic Dick Tracy villain who was first introduced in 1947 and was played by Dustin Hoffman in the 1990 Warren Beatty Dick Tracy movie, is canonically a furry, and told Dick this himself,” boy, I dunno. Anyway, the MCU is on the tail (haha, get it) of Mumbles and his pals after their dramatic prison breakout, so I guess we’re going to see the cops staking out [extremely heavy sigh] fursuit shops or something.

Hi and Lois, 4/29/26

I’m really enjoying Lois’s facial expression in the second panel here. “Ah shit ah fuck the 22-year-old realtor influencer on TikTok who won’t shut up about ‘boosting revenues with concierge services’ did not say anything about this,” she appears to be thinking.

The Phantom, 4/29/26

I’m also really enjoying the facial expressions on long-time Phantom antagonist Eric “The Infamous Nomad” Sahara and his Gitmo guard as they give Ignis Vindicta a once over. “Is this an … actual alien guy, or some dude in a mask from Spirit Halloween, or what?” they’re both trying to figure out, with varying degrees of confusion and contempt.

Crankshaft, 4/29/26

I’m really not enjoying the facial expression on this lady in panel two, but I accept that, for denizens of the Funkyverse, “I’ve awkwardly set up a truly terrible bit of wordplay and now I’m about to unleash it” is an all-too-common scenario, and they need a visual signal to let people know that it’s about to happen.

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Herb and Jamaal, 4/21/26

I went to grad school for history (NOTE: DO NOT DO THIS) from 1996 to 1999, which was about at the tail end of the period when it might seem reasonable for someone to be going to grad school and not own a computer. Our department had a tiny little “computer lab” for grad students that was basically a little cubby off the admin office with a couple of outdated Macs and a printer. The whole time I was going there I would often see this one guy using the computers, a heavy-set dude with a shaggy beard and thick glasses who would never talk to anyone else and always be typing away furiously, which was normal enough grad student appearance/behavior/vibes that I never thought much of it, except to notice that I never saw anyone else using the lab. Anyway, one day, not long before I finally left the program in disgrace and relief, I noticed that he had left some printed pages behind, and I picked them up to finally figure out what his specialization was in the department, only to discover that what he was writing was in fact no-paragraph-breaks all-caps paranoid ideation. The question that immediately occurred to me: Did a genuinely crazy person somehow figure out that our computer lab was never used and that nobody would question him if he came in to type up his little manifestos? Or had he at one point been a normal (“normal”) grad student who was driven mad by academia, in a turn that validated my decision to quit?

Anyway, just thought of this little episode as I read today’s Herb and Jamaal. When I told my stepmother my story, she asked “Did you, uh, tell anyone? Because he might be dangerous?” And I was like “Nope! Ha ha! Not my business!” But I can see that Herb is taking his responsibilities a little more seriously than I did.

Pluggers, 4/21/26

It’s kind of interesting that there are no plugger cows, right? I sort of thought that maybe it’s because their society is tilted towards predators and aggressive herbivores like Rhino-Man, but maybe it’s actually because plugger envy of the gentle bovine’s digestive prowess has led to cows being pushed out of their society.

Dick Tracy, 4/21/26

“What with them all being freaks of nature with weird skull shapes and all. They’re easy for us to spot and catch! Hey, you ever think there might be a bunch of normal-looking criminals getting away with stuff around here because we don’t really notice them?”

Heathcliff, 4/21/26

What do you think goes on at the nightclub for frogs named after their main prey animal? Probably some real fucked-up shit, right?

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Pluggers, 3/30/26

Wait, so we’re saying that pluggers … don’t like sports? Watching the wildly popular NCAA basketball tournament is non-plugger behavior? Pluggers prefer to pore over their financial statements, like a bunch of fucking nerds? Is that what pluggers have come to these days? This is much more shocking than them being poly now or whatever.

Archie, 3/30/26

I have to say that a dark horse for “most unrealistic aspect of Archie comics” is that Veronica, daughter of the most cartoonishly wealthy family in town, attends the local public school with the plebes. That having been said, this is a decent joke, and in my opinion what really makes it is that it’s Archie who’s been assigned the task of delivering the RSVP, despite the Lodges canonically having a butler.

Dick Tracy, 3/30/26

Oh, hey, I guess we know why Silver Nitrate has had such anxiety since he’s been in prison: turns out he’s a snitch! I sure hope none of his fellow prisoners read the syndicated newspaper comic strip Dick Tracy.