Archive: Family Circus

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Family Circus, 3/16/18

God damn that is one smug looking turtle, you guys. It’s like he’s thinking to himself, “I might’ve been late getting on the ark, but at least I got there, if you follow me? Eh? Eh? Behemoth and leviathan? This guy knows what I’m talking about.”

Beetle Bailey, 3/16/18

I don’t know if that dagger is military issue or if it’s something Sarge ordered from some creepy-ass knife catalog like the ones my elderly neighbor got and used to show to me without me asking or indicating in any way that I wanted to see them, but I love the fact that he’s got what’s clearly meant to be a vicious weapon for close-in combat and using it for an act of joy, which is to say hewing off chunks of a giant sandwich that he’s gorging on continuously over a 24-hour period.

Gil Thorp, 3/16/18

Guys, guys

the social justice teens

are going to defeat Marty Moon

in the marketplace of ideas

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Mary Worth, 3/15/18

Oh, well, this is nice, Wilbur and Dawn are saying a heartfelt goodbye before she leaves on a three-month trip, and … WAIT A MINUTE, COMPUTER: ENHANCE

I guess that’s a coloring mishap that’s rendered Wilbur’s flesh a weird green color, and that that’s his wrist and hand bending around Dawn’s shoulder, but it sure looks like a ghastly tentacle is writhing out of Wilbur’s sleeve and wrapping around his daughter as he finally reveals his true form. He shouldn’t be alive, but he is, because he’s one of the ageless Old Ones whose human fleshsuit is starting to slough off!

Dick Tracy, 3/15/18

Ah, it looks like Ghost Pepper isn’t dead after all, and Dick is a little too confident of his ability to kill his enemies indirectly. Fortunately, there are lots of ways a man (a ghost? a ghost-man?) can die fleeing from trigger-happy cops down a snowy mountainside!

Family Circus, 3/15/18

You know how the Keane Kompound walls are generally vast, featureless voids? Well, Mommy has finally decided to do something about it! Too bad she waited until after the endless undifferentiated emptiness drove her insane.

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Funky Winkerbean, 2/24/18

Man, I sometimes I feel like either Funky Winkerbean doesn’t understand the motivations and behavior of actual human beings, or I don’t? Why does Pete need Darin and his family to be his traveling companions? Pete and Darin live in California, so they probably aren’t driving all the way back to Ohio, and it’s not like Darin’s going to spring for Pete’s plane ticket. Pete went to high school in Westview and last we heard had a romantic interest in nearby Centerville, so it’s not even like it would be weird for him to travel there himself! All I can think of is that Pete is so cheap that he wants to split an Uber from the airport, which is weird but at least offers some vague explanation for the “joke” in the final panel.

Family Circus, 2/24/18

I gotta admit, the idea of someone literate just stone cold making up rules that aren’t actually in her culture’s preferred holy book and imposing them on someone illiterate is pretty funny! After further reflection, I also have to admit that this was probably pretty common behavior for, say, most of human history.

Mark Trail, 2/24/18

Ah ha, now we see where this Mark Trail plot is going! “Oh, you whiny libs don’t like the way the circus treats the animals, huh? Well, what if the circus just let the animals roam free in your neighborhood??? I bet you’d be in favor of a little animal cruelty then!!!!” I’m honestly excited to learn how Wilhelm the clown fits into this. “Oh, you whiny libs think clowns are scary and disturbing, huh? Well, in this case you’re right, this dude is a straight-up nightmare given flesh.”

Pluggers, 2/24/18

The pluggers were warned that the death panels were coming, so we had to make them extra subtle.