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The Lockhorns, 9/25/20

What with his suburban lifestyle, his commute by rail, and his Jets and Mets fandom, Leroy has always clearly been a creature of Long Island. However, given that the Mets last won a World Series 34 years ago and yet Leroy looks not a day older today than he does in that photo, we must come to the terrifying conclusion that he’s a creature of another kind — namely, one that drains the life force of others in order to gain eternal youth. Perhaps the source of his energy is the hapless Mets themselves, which Leroy doesn’t even realize, which means that he can only continue to walk the earth as long as their on-field failure continues? This seems fully in line with his general cursed air.

Family Circus, 9/25/20

Jeffy, it’s not a question of how old you have to be as much as one of how smart you have to be. So, uh, good luck with that!

Mary Worth, 9/25/20

“Why sales? Have you done it before?”

“Uh…”

[SMASH CUT TO: TOMMY’S THOUGHT BALLOON]

Mary Worth, 10/5-12/04

“…no, not, uh, not really.”

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Family Circus, 8/28/20

My favorite facial expression in this whole crowd is definitely Barfy’s. “I’m sorry, what? You thought that was fun? Do you know that my ancestors gave up autonomy and life in the wild and hitched our stars to you clowns so we could live inside, where it’s warm and soft and there aren’t any ticks? If I wanted to be a wolf I’d still be a fucking wolf. What’s the matter with you?”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/28/20

Well, there have been a lot of boring plots in Rex Morgan, M.D., lately but at least this time around we’ve got a fun villain and good timely plot so I for one am excited to watch the drama unf–oh. Oh, I see, the cops have caught up with him already. Welp, that’s it for this one folks, tune in next week when [spins wheel] Buck befriends a down-on-his-luck [spins wheel again] classic car restoration expert and helps him set up a website.

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Family Circus, 8/17/20

As a professional comics curmudgeon, my ethics dictate that I must acknowledge when one of the comics I usually dump on is good, and folks: this Family Circus is a good one. The irony of Jeffy’s t-shirt proclaiming that he’s a happy camper as he experiences a comically overwrought meltdown is great, of course, but my favorite thing is just how chill Dolly is. She’s usually the family snitch and would love nothing more than to narc on Jeffy for throwing a tantrum, but look at her: She’s wearing her shades and her casual camping clothes. She’s on vacation, just like she’s trying to explain to her brother. It’s not the time for this, Jeffy! You’re free! You don’t have to be like your usual dumb self here!

Hi and Lois and Daddy Daze, 8/17/20

Meanwhile, I’ve quite rightly never been left in charge of an infant for any length of time, but these strips both seem to depict … pretty good ways to suffocate your infant? Are these scenes bad for infants, health wise? Sound off in the comments on infant safety around huge piles of clothes or stuffed animals or whatever.