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Gil Thorp, 11/16/11

Trust me, the current plot of Gil Thorp is totally not worth time time it would take for me to describe it to you, but I do think everyone can find today’s strip amusing. Say what you will about those Mudlarks, but they sure are together emotionally. Most high school athletes would probably be cowed or angry when one of their coaches freaked out on them, but these guys just sweatily crack wise and do a little armchair (or sideline bench) psychoanalysis. “Ho hum, another high school football coach who’s just living vicariously through us, probably because his life peaked during his own high school days and now he’s way too emotionally invested in these largely meaningless contests! I mean, he’s right, we do suck, but he should be taking an entirely different motivational tack if he expects us to respect him.”

Judge Parker, 11/16/11

If only Derek were so self-aware; instead, it’s becoming increasingly clear that his feeble teenage wits are no match for Sophie’s robotic intelligence and grim determination to possess him “I’m sure you had no idea … but she threatened me today, after I openly declared my intentions of stealing you away from her! It was totally unprovoked, except for the part where I kept taunting her!”

Ziggy, 11/16/11

Ha ha, those wacky foreigners! Not so bright, but very, very hungry! They’re starving! Literally. Because of the famines. Wacky!

Hi and Lois, 11/16/11

In other news, Trixie thinks her mom is fucking the dog, I guess.

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Gil Thorp, 10/27/11

Now, I know it’s hard to focus on the speechifying, what with all the sexy, sweaty weight-lifting being served up to us, but there’s some good old fashioned mentoring strategizing going on here! Sure, Gil may have only heard of Asperger’s Syndrome like three strips ago, and the only thing he knows about Brody Abro is that he doesn’t like talking to other kids, but his unerring coaching instincts tell him that what Brody really needs is to talk to some other kids. This can’t possibly end badly! Look at how sweaty the man is, he clearly knows what he’s talking about.

Mary Worth, 10/27/11

“God damn it, am I going to have to find true love for every mousy waitress in this stupid diner? Uh, let’s see … where there is love there is can be no fear … to live in hearts we leave behind is not to die … am I getting warm yet? Christ, I just want to eat some pie in peace already.”

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Six Chix, 10/25/11

Aw, I like the mildly desperate grin that the skeleton is sporting in that costume shop window. “Ladies! Zombies are just as done as vampires! Skeletons are the new hotness! We’re shambling and terrifying and undead just like zombies, but without all that distasteful rotting flesh! Remember the Jason and the Argonauts movie, where he sword-fights with skeletons? Remember how bad-ass that was? SKELETONS! I … no, please, come into the shop … buy some of our skeleton paraphernalia … oh, God, I’m so lonely …”

Gil Thorp, 10/25/11

I’m really truly excited about Gil Thorp tackling the sensitive subject of Asperger’s Syndrome and totally botching it, but for right now I’d like to focus on good ol’ Wildcat, presiding over what appears to be a Milford Booster Club dinner party. Notice that everyone else is casual clothes, while Wildcat is gussied up in a white tuxedo, bow tie slightly askew. Is he coming home from his day job as a croupier? Or will “raising the formality of Milford Booster Club meetings” be his next crusade, right after he finds the Mudlarks a new kicker (precise location on the autistic spectrum unimportant)?

Momma, 10/25/11

Poor spelling is of course something we should be rightfully condemn, but we should at least give these pint-size taggers props for putting up graffiti with a philosophical message, no matter how nihilistic. Most vandalism seeks merely to aggrandize the vandal, or to mark out the territory of various criminal syndicates; these young men have instead proclaimed their bleak worldview to the city. Kudos!

Apartment 3-G, 10/25/11

“Thank goodness, everyone has stopped expecting any sort of achievement out of me. That’s a relief! Guess I’ll slip back into invisibility and quiet desperation once again. Really, it’s what I do best!”