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Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/10/23

The Marvin crossover we never hoped we’d see.

Gil Thorp, 8/10/23

Meanwhile it’s Relationship Week over at Gil Thorp, establishing or recapping its myriad cross‑cultural, ‑gender, ‑institutional, and other conflicts in advance of the fall season. Here, Sluggin’ Girls’ Softball right fielder Inma Rimsha and disgraced Valley Tech import hurler Kwan Tak “The Korean Nightmare” share a tender moment. Protip, Inma: if you want to win Kwan’s heart, bring a sack of Haitai Honey Butter Chips along to your next picnic. Although signs suggest his heart is as far as you’re gonna get.

Daddy Daze, 8/10/23

Gah, is there a more relentlessly wretched comics character than Paul Daze’s Goth Pal Chuck Chuck? Yes! Imagine his children, cruller-stuffed and sugar-high, rolling around their dank rooms writing abuse memoirs and plotting his murder.

Pearls Before Swine, 8/10/23

Chuck Chuck has one thing right, though: the donuts always find a way in.

Make a generous contribution to the Comics Curmudgeon today—donut hesitate!

—Uncle Lumpy

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Click the banner to contribute by PayPal, or here for other options.

It’s the 2023 Comics Curmudgeon Summer Fundraiser!

Dustin, 8/8/23

Pardon me, Dustin, but didn’t this cute unattached (no ring, anyway) vaguely bohemian young redhead just express an interest in you? And the best you can muster is some half-assed wisecrack? Maybe you’re daydreaming about all those girls who’re gonna shoot you down at the fern bar tonight? Up your game, buddy, or at least pay attention.

Six Chix, 8/8/23

Did she just put her nose inside that pumpkin’s nose? Only the pumpkin knows for sure, but signs point to “Yes.”

Candorville, 8/8/23

Smoothest line you’re gonna get from a guy in a Kirk shirt.

Gil Thorp, 8/8/23

The question “Where is Milford? (more precisely, “Which Milford?” among the many) has long puzzled the sages. Opinion seemed settled on western Ohio, but today’s “hoagie” makes a strong case for eastern Pennsylvania.

For the modest price of a hoagie, po’ boy, grinder, sub, or Italian sandwich, you could make a generous contribution to the Comics Curmudgeon! Do it today—before lunch!

—Uncle Lumpy

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Mary Worth, 8/4/23

Greta and … Max? What about Greta’s prison love, Holly? Man, if you had told me that Mary Worth’s grimdark tale of dogs being held hostage in hellish conditions to satisfy sadistic whims would in ony a few weeks resolve itself into “Ho ho, is it a doggie love triangle?” I … well, I wouldn’t have been that surprised, actually.

Judge Parker, 8/4/23

Good news, everyone! That little kidnapped girl has been reunited with her family some fairly menacing guy who she seems to like and I guess works for her wealthy father. Anyway, it’s a real shame that Sam and Abbey are going to spend a good chunk of what was supposed to be their sex vacation trying to find and give money to a bear.

Gil Thorp, 8/4/23

“I’ve been betting on these poor boys. Big money, too! That’s legal, right?” [Coach Kaz whispers in his ear] “Uh, no further comment, this press conference is OVER, get those cameras OUT OF HERE”