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Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/18/21

“Wow, so instead of straining to come up with story elements ex nihilo like I’ve been doing, you used aspects of your everyday life for raw material? Brilliant! By the way, you’ve never heard of ‘character rights,’ have you? Great, great.”

Panels from Hagar the Horrible, 7/18/21

Have you ever wanted to see an elderly Viking woman learning the basics of supply and demand curves … the hard way? Well, the throwaway panels from today’s Hagar the Horrible are for you, my friend.

Hi and Lois, 7/18/21

I’m actually kind of surprised that legacy cartoonists, who have some of the most secure jobs on the planet, don’t just straight-up put their erotic fantasies in their strips more often. I’m definitely not surprised that those erotic fantasies involve golf, though.

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Hagar the Horrible, 7/6/21

Ha ha! It’s funny because Lucky Eddie has made this same silly dad joke repeatedly, every time Hagar’s warband comes to sack this tiny little village, which, again, has happened often enough for everyone to get sick of the joke. Can you imagine the horror? Can you imagine these defenseless villagers forced to give up whatever meager amounts of wealth they’ve been able to accumulate since the last raid or suffer ghastly, violent consequences? Can you imagine them hiding in the ruined castle, once a symbol of the Carolingian Empire that restored peace and order to Western Europe, but now just an empty shell as the grandsons and great-grandsons of Charlemagne squabble amongst themselves, leaving the periphery of the Empire to rot? I’m sure they too would see the humor in Eddie’s little jest, were they not cringing in terror in some dark hiding spot somewhere!

Marvin, 7/6/21

If you only knew about Marvin from my blog, you might have a slanted view of the strip as being primarily about pooping. That’s not true, though; it’s really about a smug nightmare baby who, among his many other bad qualities, can dish it out but can’t take it. (Both “it”s in that sentence, to be perfectly clear, refer to poop.)

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Hagar the Horrible, 6/29/21

The most unsettling thing about today’s extremely gross Hagar the Horrible is Hagar’s eager smile in the final panel. I’m not sure which possibility is worse: that Hagar is intrigued by this new an thoroughly repulsive weapon that Lucky Eddie has just added to the Viking band’s arsenal, or if he’s just excited and maybe a little aroused to watch someone barf.

Judge Parker, 6/29/21

Folks, it looks like Neddy is finally going to be forced by her circumstances to truly go out on her own and make it as a responsible adult! Fortunately, by the look of panel two, she’s prepared herself for this potentially difficult conversation by getting extremely high first.

Gil Thorp, 6/29/21

Swordfights? More like accidental suicide pacts, kid! Surprisingly, it seems like someone maybe hasn’t been spending enough time at the library.

Mary Worth, 6/29/21

“OK, we’ve established that these two attractive women are uncouth and sexually aggressive. Now they’re going to compete for Dr. Drew’s love. What are their tactics? Showing up at his work with coffee for him, right?” –the Mary Worth creative team, apparently (LOVE U GUYS, PLEASE DON’T EVER CHANGE)