Post Content

Wow! I go away for a few days to spend a little quality time with my mom and now I’ve sat down to do some bloggy stuff and found that you guys have made … some comments. A lot of comments. An extra large number of very funny comments.

I bow down to your comics obsessiveness. I was going to skip over the days I flaked out on, but now I see that you all deserve better than that. Thus, today I offer you quick takes on the weekend’s strips just past.

Judge Parker, 8/11/06

As has been widely noted, the new Judge Parker artist, after a very strong start, seemed to suddenly come to the totally understandable conclusion of “Holy crap, this is Judge Parker, why the hell am I putting any work into it?”, and the quality of the lettering and, to a lesser extent, art suddenly declined. It’s still an improvement over the previous artist, who made everyone look vaguely like one another and not-so-vaguely like monkeys. He also deserves kudos for making Horace look at least quasi-human. For your reference, here’s old-artist Horace:

Yeesh.

By the way, if the phrase “more than just a business relationship” doesn’t make your gaydar ping just a little, then you and I have very different agendas in reading Judge Parker, my friend. It adds a particularly twisted twist to Horace’s desperate attempt to get randy young Randy married off to somebody — anybody — before enduring the public scrutiny of an election.

Mark Trail, 8/11/06

Like any true Mark Trail aficionado, I find this strip totally unrealistic. Everyone knows that Kelly Welly wouldn’t beat around the bush, but would just say “bear penis.”

For Better Or For Worse, 8/12/06

You know, I think this strip is really sweet. I mean, in this go-go, youth-focused world, it’s nice to see a depiction of the sort of gentle, loving, but still very deep intimacy that builds up over the decades of an essentially decent marri… oh, who am I kidding. PLEASE GOD DON’T MAKE ME THINK ABOUT ELLIE AND JOHN DOING IT NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Gil Thorp, 8/12/06

You know, for a strip as manic as Gil Thorp, the wordless final panel here is almost shocking. It really brings home the sad and quiet desperation behind a character who’s usually full of bluster. It almost makes you feel sorr… oh, who am I kidding. WEEP, MOON, WEEP! YOU’RE SCREWED! SOON YOU’LL BE IN THE POORHOUSE! MOO HA HA HA HA HA!

Apartment 3-G, 8/14/06

You know what’s important to creating a storyline about underlying sexual tension? Having it involve at least one character who we might believe to have some sort of inner sexual persona. I’m not sure how either of these sad sacks would react to some sort of potential romantic relationship, but I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be sexy. Tommie’s look of panic and confusion in the final panel seems about right.

Post Content

Remember, people: If you get an infantile urge to giggle every time you hear the phrase “Work them like a claw … and call me Randy,” then you should buy either the men’s or women’s working-it-like-a-claw-themed shirt over at the Comics Curmudgeon store. Then you should take a picture of yourself wearing it and send it to me, like faithful reader Bigfoot did:

I think Randy and April were eating Chinese food, not sushi, but you have to admire her dedication to verisimilitude.

(If you don’t have a clue as to what the hell this is about, click here and scroll down.)

Post Content

Man, a guy goes away for a few days, and some pretty twisted romance goes down in the funny pages. Let’s check in with the weekend’s high points!

First, Sunday’s Mary Worth will go down in infamy as the Day The Stalking Started. We need to begin by taking a look at this panel:

The fact that Mary doesn’t want to spend time with creepy sublettor Aldo Kelrast needs no explanation, but why does she feel that the best way to reject him is to babble on like a minor character in a Jane Austen novel? She seems to be taking the line that if she’s seen spending time along with a man 15 years her junior while her not-actually-her-boyfriend is out of the country, she’ll be branded as a whore. Which may seem ludicrous to those of here on planet Earth, but check out the two old biddies in the left half of this panel, clearly in mid-gossip. Already the tales of Mary’s trampish sluttery — talking to a strange man with her arms and shoulders exposed! — are no doubt spreading throughout the hallways of Santa Royale’s most exclusive mid-range child-free condo complex.

Meanwhile, Aldo forgets that the first rule of stalking club is: don’t talk about stalking club.

This panel has actually solved a little dilemma for me. Since Aldo first came on the scene, I’ve imagined his voice to be effete and quasi-British, like Dr. Smith in Lost In Space. Mrs. C. feels that instead it should be high-pitched and nasal — the classic movie nerd voice. Now, however, it’s clear that he talks like George Zimmer, the guy who does all those damn Men’s Wearhouse commercials.

Speaking of classic movie nerd voices, this weekend Raju got a little pep talk from Abbey:

Yeah, Raju, go for it! Go for it! And say, who’s lounging cartoonishly sexily in the next room?

Let the daughter pimping begin!

Meanwhile, in Lost Forest, Mark Trail is expressing his forbidden love for Kelly Welly the only way he can: by tackling her.

Despite the fact that even casual readers of this strip know that this is Kelly, Mark’s been referring to her as “he” and “him” for days now, presumably as another part of the sublimation process.

And speaking of forbidden love, “Dr.” “Troy”‘s head exploded.

He’s also, to the surprise of no one, not a real doctor. I keep waiting for Rex to laugh and say, “Join the club, Troy, join the club.”