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Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/26/20

Guys, I think our favorite medical-themed soap opera strip is going to start talking about the one medical problem that everyone’s got on their mind these days? Nobody’s said “COVID” or “coronavirus” yet but Truck’s talking about staying with his brother “for the duration” and he won’t be playing clubs for a while, so I think the Morganverse is finally going to catch up with us! Anyway, Buck, tech support for the downtrodden, is going to set up some kind of streaming concert for Truck on Twitch or Instagram Live or something, which honestly sounds pretty sad, not at all like the Zoom comedy show I’m doing next week, which will be fun and cool and good.

Mary Worth, 5/26/20

Fortunately for the Dawns of this world, Mary Worth, the comic strip, very much does not turn on a dime. Did you think this Dawn/Jared plotline was basically over two weeks ago when Dawn told Jared she wouldn’t be dumping him? Turns out nope! Turns out Dawn’s gonna process it all and there’s no end in sight!

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Mark Trail, 5/23/20

“Well, of course, Mark, that’s understandable. But we’re not doing another camping trip for a couple of months. Maybe in the fall you might want to–”

“MY DOG, GEOFF. MY DOG ANDY. HE’S VERY BIG. MY CALENDAR IS EXTREMELY FULL, WITH ANDY TIME”

The Lockhorns, 5/23/20

Well, the online discourse that erupted after Martin Scorsese declared that Marvel movies aren’t cinema a few months ago has mostly died down, but Leroy? Leroy is ready to fan the flames again. Watch out, film Twitter!

Mary Worth, 5/23/20

“I can’t really explain it, but when I got to the airport in Santa Royale, the city where I grew up and where I go to college, I really felt like I was home! Probably because I live here, I guess. Oh, also Jared was there to drive me back to the condo or whatever.”

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Mary Worth, 5/22/20

I had sort of been hoping that Mary Worth would never do a coronavirus pandemic plot, that it would just remain my happy place forever when the worst thing we had to worry about was how many mai tais Wilbur’s had, but now that Mary and Dawn are moving on from “Cheating’s fine, honestly, most of the time there isn’t really any hard feelings” to “You know who the real heroes are? Doctors, and nurses, and whatever it is Jared does, I’m not clear on it exactly but he definitely wears scrubs and works at the hospital,” I worry that we’re headed in that direction. I’ll allow it only if Jared succumbs to COVID, allowing Dawn to weep bereft pandemic tears for months.

Shoe, 5/22/20

Despite how long I’ve written about comics, there are still parts of the creative process I don’t understand. In Shoe, for instance, what factors determine the punchlines that get Goggle Eyes of Horror and the ones that get Heavy Lids and Undereye Bags of Despair?