Post Content

Mother Goose and Grimm, 1/15/22

One of the last pure pleasures of social media is when some bizarre bit of pop culture ephemera from decades past gets surfaced and passed around, and last summer many of us had some good fun with “Inhalants,” a song from McGruff the Crime Dog’s 1987 anti-drug album that, as a viral tweet put it, “sounds like New Order.”

So, I have one note on this otherwise amazing song, which is that “inhalants” is a pretty technical term and probably most kids don’t know that it means, like, huffing paint or sniffing glue, but otherwise this a banger of a track that manages to pack a lot of emotions in to the gimmicky McGruff voice, and I immediately thought of it when I saw today’s Mother Goose and Grimm. This McGruff? The one with the thousand-yard stare and a barful of empty shot glasses in front of him? That’s the guy who sings “they can break you in two” about inhalants and you can tell he knows exactly what he’s talking about.

Family Circus, 1/15/22

Guys, I’ve been spending a lot of time staring at this Family Circus, in which Billy eagerly stares at his mother in a low-cut dress and talks about people getting their eyes knocked out, and trying to come up with an Oedipus joke and I just can’t quite make the pieces fit together. I feel like I’ve let you all down on this one and promise to do better in the future.

Dennis the Menace, 1/15/22

A child amazed by the number of screens in a multiplex but angry that no Western films are on offer? The only menace he represents is one to the integrity of the space-time continuum if he ever returns to his native year of 1953 with knowledge of the future!

Mary Worth, 1/15/22

“Well, he didn’t jump, exactly … here, let me show you the video, but hold on a second while I queue up ‘Yakety Sax.’”

Post Content

Beetle Bailey, 11/12/21

Plato is exactly the kind of dork who would try to pull off the “the most erotic organ of all is the brain” thing, but declaring that he’s about to read erotic fiction and jerk off his cerebral cortex right here in front of everybody is a bridge too far.

Family Circus, 11/12/21

Meanwhile, Billy is claiming to have some kind of terrible amoeboid brain parasite in a last ditch effort to avoid the consequences of just being kind of dumb.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/12/21

Here’s today’s Mother Goose and Grimm! It’s about some dogs that are about to piss on another dog’s tongue.

Post Content

Hi and Lois, 10/5/21

I’m not sure when, strictly speaking, we can say that untucked shirts came into fashion, but I’m going to say that it’s been … pretty much my entire adult life? And I’m 47? Anyway, I like how absolutely thrilled Hi looks in panel one. He never thought he’d live to see the day when a man might untuck his shirttails and still retain his dignity, but that day has arrived, and his life has been transformed.

Marvin, 10/5/21

There are two big narrative problems with this strip. One is that Bitsy’s character model includes full-time collar wearing — he’s got one on in this very strip — so it’s weird for the fish to imply that it’s a potty-specific accessory. Maybe this should’ve said “leash”? Two, fish “go potty” in their own bowl, turning their very environment into a stew of their own wastes, which is surely more shameful than however you want to think about what dogs have going on this department. The thing I hate about Marvin is that it makes you think about pissing and shitting on several narrative layers at any given moment.

Pluggers, 10/5/21

Look, when pluggers are all smug about how down-homey and real-American they are, I enjoy getting riled up about it. But when they’re wracked with shame about their strange, man-animal bodies? That’s a lot less fun, in my opinion. Please, pluggers, get your act together so you may remain a worthy antagonist for me!

Mother Goose and Grimm, 10/5/21

Jokes on you, Grimm! That guy’s not a man at all! He’s a bird!