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Mother Goose and Grimm, 7/21/25

You all know that “fire hydrants are like toilets, to a dog” is one of my pet peeves, but I frankly find it a million times less objectionable than I do “toilet water is like alcohol, to a dog, in that, among other things, it reduces their inhibitions and makes them more sexually aggressive.” People know the water in a toilet is just regular water, right? What do they think is in there to make Grimm here drunk? Is it piss? Do they think you can get drunk by drinking piss?

Intelligent Life, 7/21/25

Love to go to the movies with my pal, ask “So what did you think of [full movie title, including the colon]” as the credits roll, and then listen to him give some half-baked rambling metaphor that’s about box office numbers or maybe media coverage. That’s what the beautiful art of film is all about, to me!

Between Friends, 7/21/25

You know the old saying: “Show, don’t tell. And if you can’t show, tell in the form of showing a conversation between two people about the thing you’re trying to show. And if you can’t do that, show one of the two people summarizing the conversation in thought balloons as they’re having it.”

Family Circus, 7/21/25

“So how come you’re still talking instead of shutting up, dumbass?” –Sam, probably

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Mother Goose and Grimm, 6/27/25

Look, we all associate Cinderella with trying on glass slippers, but canonically, the Prince’s retinue repeated the process over and over again with different girls, and once Cinderella put it on and proved her identity, that was the end of the glass-slipper-trying-on process. She only had to do it once! And she didn’t really wear glass slippers after that! Why would she want to wear them again as an old woman, as if she were in the habit of it? I know that fact-checking a cartoon is boring and lame, but I feel like we should hold a strip that’s literally called Mother Goose and Grimm to a higher standard.

Alice, 6/27/25

I know you all rely on me for keeping you up to date on the lore developments in the insane fever dream comic Alice, so here’s the latest: the weird Alice aliens live underneath Alice’s floorboards now, and one of them is in love (?) with her? More on this as it develops in new and insane ways!

Dennis the Menace, 6/27/25

Look at Mr. Wilson’s face. That’s the expression of a guy who’s either going to get rich at the blackjack table or die via suicide by casino security. Either way, he’s not gonna have to deal with this brat again.

Heathcliff, 6/27/25

They banned spiral hams and are putting our Heathcliff in prison, when are people gonna wake up to what’s going on in our country

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Blondie, 6/20/25

Imagine how much funnier this strip would be if Blondie had spent any of the past 90 years or so developing the characters and backstories of Dagwood’s coworkers. Instead, we’re left staring blankly at the antics of the guy who apparently thinks he’s fat, doesn’t-want-to-be-upside-down guy, and Garfield lady, DithersCo’s #1 Garf superfan. Honestly the most intriguing person to me is the guy Dagwood runs into in the elevator, who is absolutely seething at the idea of an office having “funny t-shirt day,” a proposal that is simply wildly out of step with the current sociopolitical climate. How dare they!

Mother Goose and Grimm, 6/20/25

Look, I get that when you have comics with dogs in them, you’re gonna do some jokes where the punchline is “a fire hydrant or a tree is for them what a toilet is for us!” and that’s fine. But please, I’m begging you to fully think through that metaphor when you do strips like this. Would you draw a person lurking in a room of giant toilets thinking “I’ve died and gone to heaven!”, the message clearly being that they love pissing? Of course you wouldn’t. They’d put you on a list and they’d be right to do it.

Pluggers, 6/20/25

It’s very distressing to me that this plugger is wandering around outside, with no visible houses or any other kind of structures to be seen. If he were in his living room, I would be like, “Ha, pluggers do be losing track of stuff! Relatable!” But as it is, I feel like we need to issue a Silver Alert post-haste.