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Panel from Sally Forth, 8/24/08

If you squint very hard at this panel, you will see that Ted has in fact spent the better part of the afternoon reading this very site, and I must give a huge thanks to faithful reader and Sally Forth scribe Ces Marciuliano for the shout-out! This is the most explicit mention of this blog in a mainstream newspaper comic since Rick Detorie had me killed.

Ted’s sang-froid after spending many hours perusing this blog (and, presumably, the comments) proves that he doesn’t care a bit about all of the slurs on his masculinity. I’m not surprised he’s a fan, since my target demographic has always been the pop-culture-obsessed emotionally arrested man-child.

Panels from For Better Or For Worse, 8/24/08

The rest of today’s FBOFW was a nauseating vortex of schmaltz and teal, but, God help me, I actually laughed at this. John apparently has no interest in actually forming a personal relationship with Anthony (and really, who can blame him), but will be exploiting the marital tie to get services for free. If all the stuff that folks gave out of the goodness of their hearts for this wedding is any indication, this is actually the driving principle behind all Patterson social interaction.

Panels from Mary Worth, 8/24/08

“What’s the matter with me? I miss Ian already!” is perhaps the most cogent question that has ever been asked in this strip. And the second panel, in which our poor heroine realizes that she has betrayed the trophy wife code, and that her heart is being inexorably pulled down into her husband’s emotional gravity well, is definitely among this feature’s most harrowing moments.

Panel from the Phantom, 8/24/08

Criminals in Mawitaan had better watch out — when Black Orville Redenbacher is on the case!

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Phantom, 7/1/2008

Joke’s on you, Stripey — this guy’s just as crazy as you are, and has a much better claim to the premises. You two “heroes” work it out among yourselves — just stay the hell off our streets.

Curtis, 7/1/2008

Yup — no stereotyping here.

Funky Winkerbean, 7/1/2008

Les and Santa there look a little too happy about Tony’s return, in a way that can’t bode well for Funky. And from the shaky grasp of the English language betrayed in panel three, things aren’t looking up for author Tom Batiuk, either.

Gasoline Alley, 7/1/2008

Ah, the fog parts and all becomes clear: The Humiliation of Rufus, Part XXVII reveals the futility of his dreams of glory, and betrayal of his unconditional love by the kitten he saved. On the plus side, he’s ready for a major part in Funky Winkerbean or Crankshaft.

Mary Worth, 7/1/2008

In the harsh glare of Mary’s intrusiveness, it’s easy to overlook the soft glow of her unrelenting pettiness. Here, she spurns her new (entirely hypothetical) love interest on the basis of his distaste for her beloved seafood: “Don’t like scrod? Then no, by God!”

Hey, everybody — Josh is back! Look for an “I’m back” post sometime Tuesday afternoon, followed by the generous banquet of the Joshy goodness we’ve all come to know and love. Thanks!

— Uncle Lumpy

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Fists aplenty as the new week explodes with action! Let’s dive in:

Judge Parker, 6/30/2008

“Cheatham House” is a good choice to publish this novel — there may be rough bloody justice on the dust jacket, but it’s 400 pages of contract negotiations on the inside. Manly stalwart Sam Driver is up to the task, with the proviso he won’t have to kiss any icky girls.

Mark Trail, 6/30/2008

“Unpredictable” Kelly Welly closes the deal on a week of foreshadowing, planting good Moss Green in the good green moss.

The Phantom, 6/30/2008

Ghost-who-trespasses got some ‘splainin’ to do.

Dick Tracy, 6/30/2008

Dick’s high tech is stymied again, and all he can do is wave his tiny fist in panel 2. He’s the Ted Forth of crimefighters.

— Uncle Lumpy