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Funky Winkerbean, 12/6/20

“What if we had a character make a bad joke and then other characters point out that it’s a bad joke? That makes a good joke, right?” is of course a classic Funky Winkerbean bit, but I have to admit I don’t fully understand how it’s playing out here. Is the non-Mindy portion of the gang divided into rival “Mopey Pete is funny” and “Mopey Pete is not funny” factions? Is the simultaneous “HA! HA! HA!” meant to be read as sarcastic, mocking barks? Or is Darrin the only one here willing to speak truth to power? (Or, since everyone here works at a failing comics company, I guess that should be “speak truth to utter powerlessness.”)

Mary Worth, 12/6/20

Sure, the resolution of this plot seems to indicate that Brandy and Tommy’s love is strong, but that Billie Holiday quote sure undermines that, doesn’t it? I guess Brandy can just turn her love on and off like a faucet, based on what her therapist tells her! You better tread carefully, Tommy.

Dick Tracy, 12/6/20

Welp, I guess the spider plot is over, folks! I’m now very excited at the prospect of seeing Dick Tracy shoot some hippies, though probably not as excited as Dick is at the prospect of shooting some hippies.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 12/6/20

GOSH, YEAH, IMAGINE IF YOU DIDN’T LIKE BUCK BUT STILL HAD TO SEE HIS DUMB FACE IN, SAY, THE NEWSPAPER ALL THE TIME

JUST IMAGINE IT

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Shoe, 12/1/20

As is so often the case with Shoe, the eyes really tell the story here. Roz’s are bugged out in panic, of course, as she watches her life’s work and only source of income literally going up in smoke. The Perfesser is experiencing sympathetic shock in panel one, but by panel two has already wound down to his typical heavy-lidded ennui. He’s realized he’s got to die somewhere and somehow, so it might as well be here, where he’s wasted so much of his life, via smoke inhalation.

Beetle Bailey, 12/1/20

Beetle Bailey is of course a strip where every single character’s name is incredibly, painfully on the nose. The most recently introduced recurring character is a “computer whiz” tech specialist name Chips Gizmo, for Pete’s sake. So I’m not surprised that they needed the name of a general for a boxing gag and so just went straight to “Dempsey”; I am surprised, and pleased, that they made him young, handsome, and so clearly and wholesomely pleased about the prospect of punching General Halftrack in the face.

Dustin, 12/1/20

Look, man, he asked you if you were excited about the conference. You could’ve just said “no,” you know? Jesus, is everyone in this strip just incredibly sour about everything?

Rex Morgan, M.D., 12/1/20

From the feature that thrilled you with “Rex waking up” — get ready for the edge-of-your-seat excitement of “Buck falling asleep”!

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Pluggers, 11/27/20

I’ve done a lot of “This is not what a plugger is, come on, man” yelling on this blog of late, so you’d be forgiven for thinking I might rant similarly here. But if you, like me, enjoy the Star Trek franchise enough to spend any amount of time interacting with its online fanbase, you know that there are large swaths of said fanbase who are very mad about any of the newer shows because they’re too “woke” and violate series canon and aren’t real Trek and the only thing those people more passionate about than that is arguing about which of the older shows are also not real Trek. So yes, I regret to inform you that plugger Trekkies are absolutely 100% a thing.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/27/20

As various pharmaceutical giants announce what look to be very effective coronavirus vaccines and we begin to glimpse the light at the end of the pandemic tunnel, we need to start looking back and assessing what happened over the past strange and sad year. And while it’s just a tiny little blip on the cultural landscape, I think we should take a moment to marvel at the fact that the only newspaper comic strip dedicated to medical drama took the biggest real-world medical story in the past hundred years and used it as grist for “Rex reacts grumpily to minor domestic irritations” material.

Mary Worth, 11/27/20

You think that’s going to impress Brandy, Tommy? A big pyramid of liquor bottles pointing triumphantly at the red star of communism? Brandy likes patriotic American boys, so better luck next time.