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Beetle Bailey, 6/27/14

I love the way Mrs. Halftrack’s expression of forced gaiety collapses the moment Miss Buxley asks her question. I’m not sure if she was genuinely if briefly happy that something pertaining to her husband could be spun as a positive and that good feeling was genuinely deflated when she had to provide details, or if she’s just slipped into her usual sour mode of marital misanthropy but is secretly pleased to be undermining her husband in public. My guess is the latter, and since she probably views Miss Buxley as a romantic rival based on the General’s delusional reports, she’s all the more excited to relay stories of his terrible incontinence.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/27/14

How quickly Kelly’s facial expression changes from “[DOLLAR SIGNS IN EYEBALLS]” to a wistful “Oh, so … it was that easy, then?” Sorry, Kelly: like Sarah, you’re discovering that life in the Morgans’ orbit means unearned riches, which sounds great until you realize that no pile of cash can fill the space inside where personal pride is supposed to go. She might be reflecting on the irony involved here: this whole journey to becoming Sarah’s blackmail victim/personal assistant/project manager began with her getting a ride on Niki’s motorcycle, and now she doesn’t need Niki or any human affection anymore, because she has Mrs. Pierpont’s limousine and “Bugsy”.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 6/27/14

Man, women, always going for literary bad boys, am I right?

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Mark Trail, 6/26/14

OH SNAP MARK TRAIL DEFEATED THAT RAMPAGING HIPPO BY SHOVING A FLAMING STICK RIGHT ONTO ITS TONGUE!!! Some half-assed Googling failed to reveal one way or another whether this is an approved anti-hippo combat technique, so I’m going to go ahead and say: yes, it’s totally safe and normal, probably you should put a flaming stick in the mouth of any hippo you see as a precaution, even the ones at the zoo.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/26/14

I assume that Sarah and Kelly’s eerily similar facial expressions translate to something like “C O M P E N $$$$ A T I O N AWWW YEAH GETTIN PAID”

Apartment 3-G, 6/26/14

I don’t understand any of this either, Tommie! You’re saying what we’re all thinking!

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Six Chix, 6/24/14

Hey guys, here’s a comic that … I’m pretty sure is supposed to have a joke in it? Except it doesn’t seem to have a joke in it. Just a lady who feels that, due to her educational status and cultural position, she’s supposed to be better acquainted with the canon of Western literature than she is. And she feels bad enough about it that she’s willing to pay a therapist to listen to her talk about it. Which isn’t funny? It seems to not be funny. Maybe the way her therapist is looking at her with open contempt is the joke? It’s not very funny either, but it’s moderately funnier than the other thing.

Mark Trail, 6/24/14

TRUE FACT: Despite being adorable-looking and the subject of a popular and condescending tabletop game, hippos are actually super aggressive and dangerous and will just straight-up attack people for no reason at all. So I dub this Mark Trail depiction of wanton hippo violence accurate! I’m more dubious on the question of whether any African humans are actually named “Taurus,” however.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/24/14

Future rich dowager Sarah Morgan just heard the two most important sentences of her young life so far: “You’re allowed to do anything I want” and “If the museum wants my million bucks, we do it my way!” Mrs. Pierpont is writing on her little pad of paper, but Sarah is the one who should be taking notes.

Herb and Jamaal, 6/24/14

In order for the extremely mild “punchline” of this strip to work, it needs to be vaguely surprising when Jamaal compares his feelings for a jar of sourdough starter to the romantic attraction one would expect him to feel for a human woman. However, any such surprise is completely precluded by the frank and shocking scene of man-on-glassware intimacy depicted in panel three.