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Dick Tracy, 10/23/07

Tess is trying to trick Dick into killing himself. In panel one, she is lulling him into complacency by flaunting her ass.

(UPDATE: Er, I read “sleeping bag” as “sleeping pills” for some reason. Oops. Still flaunting her ass, though.)

Herb and Jamaal, 10/23/07

As noted by several faithful readers, Jamaal is making sweet love to Herb right there behind the counter of their restaurant. I defy you to tell me that something different is happening in the final panel.

Marmaduke, 10/23/07

Marmaduke is going to eat some children.

Momma, 10/23/07

Momma is a pimp.

They’ll Do It Every Time, 10/23/07

People are surprised to discover that poison is poisonous, apparently.

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Reports reach us here at Comics Curmudgeon headquarters of another spontaneous meetup of readers, this time in scenic Charlotte! I offer this pic (cropped to comic strip proportions!) and let faithful reader willethompson set the scene:

The NC/SC meet up of ’Mudges took place last Saturday, but not without some drama. The rendezvous was SUPPOSED to be at the South End Brewery in Charlotte, which, according to its website, was SUPPOSED to be in full operation under the name of (margoquote) South End Brewery (/margoquote). Therefore, when all signage indicating that a South End Brewery ever existed was eradicated like the name of a deposed dictator, the SC contingent was left to cruise up and down South Boulevard like the Flying Dutchman (and Woman).

Fortunately, thru the miracle of cellphones and a M!B!S! T-shirt, the small group did manage to collect at a nearby sub shop. The pic shows (from left) faithful readers willethompson, Chloe The Cat, the remains of Little Jeffy, and Krazy Kat enjoying a fine afternoon where all things ’Mudge were discussed. Little Jeffy was an obnoxious twit, frankly, who used a fake ID to score a few Sierra Nevada Pale Ales and then try to put the moves on Chloe. Who beheaded him and placed his head on a pike? Not Me!

Remember, if you’d like, you can set up a meetup in the forums!

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Archie, 10/22/07

Dear Archie Joke-Generating Laugh Unit 3000: I realize that placing a character’s name in apposition with a role that character plays or a task he fulfills is a quick and efficient means to provide information needed to set up a joke. However, this grammatical structure is almost never used in actual conversation between humans, and it comes across as incredibly stilted. I don’t blame you for the mistake, as you do not actually communicate verbally with biological life-forms, but I would like you to file this away in your humor-generation ruleset.

Also, jokes about text messaging are not funny, and haven’t been since the end of a relatively brief window in the late 1990s. I can understand why the notion that transmitting data electronically could cause physical pain might seem incongruous and amusing to you, but trust me on this one.

Beetle Bailey, 10/22/07

Oh, this is just about the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. Don’t you believe it, Beetle! Every blow from Sarge’s fists is really a kiss that he can’t allow himself to give you.

Dennis the Menace, 10/22/07

“Especially since we put all those cameras in the basement and then locked him down there. Ha ha, look! He’s clawing at the door again!”