Post Content

Family Circus, 4/23/06

This may be the first time ever that I’ve appreciated the Family Circus in a non-ironic fashion. Then again, this may be the first time that the Family Circus featured the aftermath of a ghastly parody of a religious sacrament that quickly descended into child-injuring violence. My favorite aspects: the discarded bible, face down in the grass, its pages no doubt scratched to ribbons by Kittycat in a desperate attempt to escape salvation; and the dripping water and anger-produced steam emanating from the aforementioned still-unsaved feline. I am a bit curious about the transistor radio — tuned to some cheesy contemporary Christian channel, no doubt. I also think that it was overkill to use the hose and the bucket and the water already in the birdbath. They really tried to baptize the hell out of that cat.

Anyway, the only way this cartoon could have been improved would have been to dress Jeffy up like Robert Mitchum’s evil preacher from Night of the Hunter.

Luann, 4/23/06

Criminey, DeGroots, this is the ghetto-ist replacement for a TiVo ever. Join the modern age, already!

This next joke, on today’s Rex Morgan, is courtesy of Mrs. C.:

You know, for someone whose parents are a doctor and a nurse, Sarah sure is sick a lot.

Post Content

Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/22/06

Cash … meeting some guy at a cheap motel room … yeah, sounds like old times, all right.

Gil Thorp, 4/22/06

Oh, I think you’ll find that somebody’s gonna get punched — Rap Dog is already hanging by a thread there, skinny dude.

Family Circus, 4/22/06

“It’s not like lunches here, where Mommy just turns the hose on us after we eat and then locks us in our room until supper time!”

Post Content

Spider-Man, 4/21/06

Peter Parker’s crack about “real news” sparked an epiphany in my fevered brain. You know what would be awesome? Since clearly crime-fighting has gone out the window in this strip, Spidey should use his wall-crawling powers to become the world’s greatest paparazzo. He could kiss the Daily Bugle goodbye and make the big bucks sending photos of Paris Hilton, Tara Reid, Lindsay Lohan, and other typical celebutants to Us and InStyle and the like. Maybe he would journey to Namibia to see Brad and Angelina’s new baby, or tussle with Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson. “This Parker always gets the best pictures!” his glamorous new non-Hitler-lookalike editors would say (“though they’re always at such odd angles,” they would add). Peter would be earning as much as his wife, and then we’d have a whole story arc about the morality of his new way of earning a living. “They chose a career in the public eye … they’re asking for it!” Peter would say. “But Peter … I’ve chosen that life too!” Mary Jane would retort. Eventually, he’d be assigned to take pictures of his own wife, and they he’d have some hard choices to make.

You know what wouldn’t be awesome? Eight more weeks of Peter sitting in front of the TV and bitching. But I suspect that’s what we’re gonna get.