Comment of the Week

My little friend is not so little anymore, Toby! In fact, she's quite large! Enormous, in fact! Nine foot six and getting taller by the day! It's actually quite alarming! We're getting into I'm a Virgo territory here! Did you watch that miniseries, by the way? It was on Amazon Prime a couple of years ago! Jharrel Jerome is a treasure! Some great performances by Elijah Wood and Walton Goggins as well, which reminds me that I need to start my Justified rewatch. Oh, Margo Martindale is another treasure, especially as a voice in BoJack Horseman. Anyway, Olive is a giant, is the point I'm trying to make.

els

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Daddy Daze, 3/10/20

Ah, yes, what you’ve all been wondering about the Daddy Daze Daddy ever since I started covering this strip: since he lives in a weird insular world inhabited by only him and a preverbal infant onto whom he projects various insane motivations, what does he do when his ex-wife, with whom he shares custody, has the baby? Well, apparently he goes down to his local coffee shop and mopes with a local goth (?) who he’s friends with, or maybe it’s just some guy he sat down next to and started talking to, who can tell, really.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/10/20

“Could she be making a hasty choice that she’ll come to regret? That’s very possible, but I can’t emphasize enough that once she walks out the door, that will be very, very much cease to be my problem.”

Family Circus, 3/10/20

Hey, remember last week when Billy realized that his mom might capable of inspiring erotic thoughts? Weird how he’s been spending this week imagining various over-the-top ways his father could die. Probably a coincidence!

Judge Parker, 3/10/20

Oh God, has Toni become a blogger? Who knew she could stoop so low?

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Mark Trail, 3/9/20

Oh, wow, it seems these troubled children are turning on each other! They overheard Kevin admitting he didn’t have a dad and are immediately unleashing the most vicious attack a teen thug can think of: “Hey, look, fellas! A homeless kid!” Fortunately Geoff is there to set everyone straight with some tough talk, or maybe he’s just going to “level the playing field” by revealing all the socially debilitating secrets that ended with these delinquents on this hike instead of doing something fun and cool literally anywhere else. Anyway, how do you feel about the fact that you can apparently see down Geoff’s throat in the final panel? Feel kind of uncomfortable? I sure do!

Mary Worth, 3/9/20

It’s true, change is inevitable, as it’s been said! But in this case, maybe it’s … not? Like maybe Mary could ask for her preferred volunteer shift instead of just meekly acquiescing to the change? What’re they gonna do if she insists, fire her?

Between Friends, 3/9/20

Oh no! The COVID-19 virus has finally reached the funny pages! Can Between Friends be isolated before the rest of our beloved characters are infected? Fortunately the strip is set in Canada, so only the zombie For Better Or For Worse crew is in immediate danger.

Family Circus, 3/9/20

Daddy was “unavoidably detained on an out-of-town trip,” and based on the whispered conversations of adults on the subject Billy has come up with some wild ideas of what’s going on exactly, involving aliens and, I assume, rectal probes.

Pluggers, 3/9/20

PLUGGERS ARE SUNDOWNING

THEY SAID IT

THE SYNDICATED NEWSPAPER PANEL PLUGGERS SAID THIS ABOUT PLUGGERS, NOT ME, I’M JUST REPORTING IT

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Panel from Mary Worth, 3/8/20

Here it is, folks: the greatest Mary Worth throwaway panel ever created. It’s a wild swing from an emotionally resonant quote from one of the great works of classic literature to the big reveal of the title of that Star Wars parody film they’ve been nattering on about all week, which is like fourteen times dumber than any of us could’ve possibly imagined, and I for one am enjoying the ride.

Judge Parker, 3/8/20

Hey, remember when Judge Parker Senior, the title character of the strip Judge Parker, went to jail? Later he got out and that was less fun, but, hear me out: what if everyone in this strip ends up going to jail?