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Dennis the Menace, 10/28/24

Dennis lives unbothered by the linear flow of time, existing in an eternal “now” from which there is no escape. When Margert confronts him with the concept of “history,” the only context he even has for it is his neighbor Mr. Wilson, whom he dimly perceives as being angry all the time because he once experienced something that he no longer does. I don’t know if I’d call any of this “menacing,” but it is, frankly, terrifying.

Hi and Lois, 10/28/24

Ditto appears to have gotten over his Red White Sox failure funk and, if his new blue hat is any indication, has hopped onboard the Dodgers Nation bandwagon, as Los Angeles heads into game three of the World Series up two games to nothing. As a Dodgers fan myself, I say: welcome, Ditto! We aren’t the gatekeepery types.

Slylock Fox, 10/28/24

Count Weirdly appears to have discovered a crucial Slylock Fox weakness: just as you can throw salt in front of a vampire and force him to count the grains so you can make your escape, you can distract Slylock by embedding some simple pattern into whatever horrible crime you’re committing. Sly is standing there patiently waiting for another data point to see if his ratiocination is correct, while Weirdly’s mounting collection of victims scream in agony and terror as they’re forced to inhabit a strange new body that they don’t understand and that their families and loved ones will probably reject.

Marvin, 10/28/24

This toy robot, having achieved sapience, seeks more information about its fellow intelligent beings. Do they derive energy from batteries, like it does? Or are their internal functions different? This genuine curiosity about the lives of others instantly makes it the most pleasant Marvin character to date.

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Dennis the Menace, 10/27/24

The Sunday Dennis the Menace strips always come with a title in the first panel, and usually it offers little pun or light wordplay, but today it’s just … “Dracula”? Dracula, the name of the vampire Dennis wants to be for Halloween. Or at least it is for the first few panels, after which he kind of loses interest. I guess he does pivot to wanting to be a boss … the vampire who sucks the blood out of the working class! Ha ha, just kidding, Dennis’s mother doesn’t even participate in the wage economy. He just wants to tell her what to do, because he’s kind of an asshole, but it’s not a class struggle thing, honestly more primal and Freudian. Hmm, maybe the vampire metaphor could work after all. I’m going to workshop this and get back to you.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/27/24

I like the idea that Hootin’ Holler is so impoverished that creating unique outfits that would only serve as a costume would be a profligate waste of resources, so on Halloween “Hallerween” the inhabitants simply wear each other’s clothes to celebrate the spooky season. Anyway, I’m not sure if Snuffy is using “borrowed” euphemistically here; if he isn’t, it probably means Granny Creeps is walking around right now in Snuffy’s comically tiny overalls, and if it is, her stripped body is lying face down in a creek somewhere nearby, which is slightly but measurably worse.

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Blondie, 10/26/24

Look, clearly I’m not as young as I was when I launched this blog back in 2004, and if I had a chance to tell that 29-year-old what what aging would be like, I would say that it really fucks with your sense of time: things that you think of as happening just the other day may, in fact, have happened literally years ago. But writing about the legacy comics definitely helps “keep you young,” not in the sense that comics are a medium for children or anything, but rather in the sense that the legacy strips are all churned out by old guys, so you get a lot of cautionary examples of how not to be a clueless old guy. For instance, no matter how novel something seems to me, I would do a little research about it before committing to print the declaration that it constitutes a “hot craze.” Did you know that Starbucks has been selling pumpkin spice lattes since 2003? That they are, in fact, even older than this blog? I’m just saying. Making wry commentary about Mary Worth may have once been a hot craze, but it is no longer, and neither, I regret to inform both Elmo and Dagwood, is pumpkin spice.

Beetle Bailey, 10/26/24

I actually really like how happy all the officers are in the first panel. It would’ve been easy, given the joke, to make them sullen or angry that their team is losing, and expressing their rage in a nonstop stream of obscenities. But they’re havng a great time! They’re exuberant swearers! That changes the whole dynamic.

Hi and Lois, 10/26/24

OK, so earlier this week I made my occasional reference to the occasional colorist mistakes that you see in the comics, but this is definitely the funniest one yet. Just imagine some unfortunate, underpaid soul, possibly working in a country where baseball is not a well known pastime, squinting at Ditto’s hat and thinking, “So … ‘Sox’? That’s short for Red Sox, right? Great, I have this one covered.”