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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/4/17

A couple years ago, Snuffy Smith brought back a beloved (?) character from days of yore, Granny Creeps, an old folk magician crone who lives in a cave. She adds an interesting element into Hootin’ Holler’s cast of characters and opens up possibilites for new kinds of stories and jokes, but thanks to the violent nature of the Holler’s society, those stories and jokes are mostly going to be about the enlistment of her dubious magical powers in the service of various long-running clan feuds.

Mark Trail, 8/4/17

HELL YEAH MAN IT’S A TREE GETTING STRUCK BY LIGHTNING AND THEN A HORSE JUMPING OVER A CLIFF

THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS BUT YOU DON’T REALLY NEED IT

IT’S A HORSE

JUMPING

OVER

A CLIFF

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Mary Worth, 8/3/17

“As a mere medical assistant, you are not authorized to question the sexual behavior of doctors! And as Dr. Fletcher’s current sexual target, his status has accrued to me! Now return to your duties and cease making eye contact with me at once!”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/3/17

“Oh, right, we saw those pills in your purse last night so we dropped him off at Child Protective Services while you were asleep. We’re the Morgans — we know what’s right for everybody!”

Spider-Man, 8/3/17

Mole-Man, having already easily defeated Spider-Man by hitting him in the thigh with a stick, is under no illusions about how much protection he can offer.

Beetle Bailey, 8/3/17

“Gosh, it makes me mad that so many people seem to view the U.S. military as the enforcement arm of an acquisitive, hegemonic imperial state rather than as a noble and purely defensive institution! At least I know there’s one unquestioningly pro-military pop culture franchise out there: Beetle Bailey. Now to take a big sip of coffee and read today’s strip.”

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Crankshaft, 8/2/17

Many of us are going to find ourselves caring for our parents as they age, and helping them do the things they can’t anymore. But we should set firm boundaries: do not engage in terribly unfunny wordplay on your parents’ behalf, if you value your dignity!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/2/17

One of my favorite things about Rex Morgan, M.D., is the panoply of Rex pissyfaces. Today’s model, which I call “I am very much NOT raising someone’s child just because you went to middle school with her and then she dropped dead in my guest room,” is a particular delight.

Dennis the Menace, 8/2/17

“I helped! Tonight we dine on filth!” Dennis is, uh, legitimately menacing today, guys.