Post Content

Gil Thorp, 4/27/24

I’m not sure what the current consensus on how to win over the teenage kids of the divorced dad you’re currently fucking, but bribing them with video games and comics strikes me as pretty good. Kind of dubious that Dick Tracy should be the go-to comic here, but it seems to have worked, so I guess she did her research.

Mary Worth, 4/27/24

Can you imagine getting reduced to a bloody smear on the asphalt by an SUV while you’re screaming obscenities at Wilbur Weston? Can you imagine that the last thing you think or feel is a boundless, seething contempt for this man, a contempt that occupies you so completely that you don’t even notice the car vrrooming towards you? I can. Frankly this has now rocketed to the very top of the list of ways I want to go out.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 4/27/24

Close, Snuffy! Given the rustic setting, the real way to bamboozle those effette urban dwellers is to market this junk pile as outsider art.

Post Content

This week’s top comment — ta da!

“It’s not enough that Zak is a gorilla. He is an ugly gorilla. Man, that Wilbur is a master of nuance.” –Bob Tice

And the runners up! They’re here, they’re very funny.

“[choke] My one weakness, Wilburite! Growing … weak … (Wilburite is his word for a woman asking him to do literally anything for another person.)” –Dan

“My favorite part of this strip is the throwaway panel, where we see Jeff silently tapping away at his computer with a look of disgust. It just makes me happy to know that he’s living a miserable life between these strips, as he deserves.” –pugfuggly

“Unfortunately Cookie could only afford to get half of Claire’s name removed, but thanks to the supernatural center-alignment formatting baked into each tattoo, it’s still a pretty solid piece of body art celebrating Cookie’s terrible fury. Can’t blame the tattoo artist for getting upset, though, because it looks like some tradition or custom of shame required him to remove his own tattoos as well.” –jroggs

“Look here, Moy, you shouldn’t give us the setup of Zak and Iris getting boxing lessons along with Wilbur imagining her as a damsel in distress needing to be saved (by Wilbur) unless you’re planning to show us Wilbur getting his shit rocked.” –Corynaut

“If I were Young Smokey, I’d be more concerned about why I have to wear pants, while the rest of the class gets to luxuriate in the altogether.” –Pozzo

“I’ve never attended Bible class, but I’m pretty confident that each lesson doesn’t have to be carved into a big stone slab, for effect. Apparently it’s what separates us from the beasts.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“Boo! Do 2 Kings 2:23-25!” –taig

“I don’t know about Iris. She has the opportunity to walk away and not talk to Wilbur and she is not taking it.” –matt w

“As an incipient (or current) (at least age-wise if not culturally) plugger myself, I can assure you I also forget where the Advil is in addition to everything else.” –Vulcan with a Mullet

“You’re a plugger if you are a drug addict but not one of the bad ones!” –Ettorre

“I know the good folks over at Marvin Inc. have their particular brand on lock, but must admit I never could have predicted this scene, an illustration of the Bristol Stool Chart depicted as the lunches on offer in a cafeteria for babies.” –Kevyn on Video

“Well, great. Half of Blondie’s demographic are already some of the few people still using Facebook and have been fully radicalized, and the other half are about to be after their grandkids show them how to find it and sign on.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Loving the posture of Morgan Kid 2.1 … 2.2 … anyway, the one with the black hair. Pray, little boy, pray! Pray to the black-haired goddess to save your dog ‘Candy!’ [Black-haired Goddess: ‘I wonder how much the taxidermist would give me for this kid’s skin?’]” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“Doc, we don’t use the word ‘fix’ within earshot of the patients, it makes them nervous.” –Old Man Shadow

“In what world can the news be able to see Gearhead Gertie up close enough (on a blimp!) to know what color her earrings are, but not recognize the obsessive NASCAR granny who spends her entire life committing outrageous stunts to show her devotion to the sport? This guy probably has to report on her antics weekly!” –Schroduck

“Y’know what’s faster than running alongside a horse? Riding the horse! I mean, I know Mark always wants to put the animals’ preferences first, but I’m pretty sure Artemis here would rather carry a couple of dopes than be turned into prosciutto di cavallo.” –BigTed

“Alas for Wilbur; the guy he knocked down was also daydreaming. He’s the Doddering Dynamo, and once he manages to get up, it’s not going to be pretty.” –MKay

“If ‘in perpetuity’ means ‘forever and a day,’ then the town charter says the name ‘Gasoline Alley’ will last forever and two days. This is somehow apt for this benighted, pointless and never ending story.” –Lawyerbob

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

Post Content

Suburban Fairy Tales, 4/26/24

Suburban Fairy Tales is one of the new strips I’ve been reading, and it’s a basically funny and enjoyable strip about cute animals, so I regret that my first discussion of it on this blog has to be scolding, but: look, it’s perfectly OK if your cute anthropomorphic animal character wears pants, and it’s also perfectly OK if they don’t, but it’s not OK at all if they take off their pants mid-comic strip and clearly aren’t wearing any underwear but also have no obvious genitalia. It raises so many questions about what pig genitals looks like in this universe, and also, frankly, what pig genitals look like in our universe, which I absolutely refuse to Google image search on but like 5% of me wants to know how well the two correlate. Also, just FYI, that’s a “3” on the pig’s tank top, because he’s #3 out of the Three Little Pigs, which is also fine, but I definitely thought for a while that that was a weird “outie” belly button taking up most of his torso, which is not fine, though it did distract me from his whole genital situation, so there’s that.

Gasoline Alley, 4/26/24

Good news, everyone! They’re not going to change the name of Gasoline Alley after all, because the Town Charter contains a number of entrenched clauses, laid down more than a century ago, that can never be amended or altered, even by a vote of the people or their representatives! This is probably fine. Hopefully Mayor Melba will not read whatever this document has to say about women holding office, or owning property.

Mary Worth, 4/26/24

One day, many years ago, a young man who had not yet reached the age of 30 decided to try out this “blogging” thing by joking about his favorite comic strip, Mary Worth, online. “This strip contains what may be the first use of the phrase ‘Wilbur makes an overture’ in the history of the English language,” he typed, while chortling drolly. Anyway, now it’s the far-future year 2024, and an old man is lying in the gutter screaming “FUCK YOU” at Wilbur, because he knocked the old man over in the midst of a weird sex fantasy about rescuing the lady at whom he made that long-ago overture from a nightmarish ape-man, and frankly I’m pretty jazzed about it, and jazzed that I still get to bring important breaking Wilbur news like this to you, my faithful readers.