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Judge Parker, 11/13/26

So, hey, remember how Neddy and her roommate Ronnie sold a Netflix show about the Spencer-Driver clan’s ties to notorious CIA assassin April, and then Kat, the actress hired to play Neddy who looked uncannily like her, started dating Ronnie, which wasn’t psychosexually weird at all? Well, Neddy and Ronnie have now sold a show about the Spencer-Driver clan’s ties to notorious scam artist Ann, and for everyone who’s been like, “Gee, Ann sure is drawn a lot like Neddy, do they not have that many models of brunette in the Parkerverse or what,” I guess you just didn’t want poor Kat to find work, huh? Are you happy about the strain their financial problems have put on her relationship with Ronnie? You make me sick.

(Just as a side note, when I was poking through my archives looking for the backstory on this, I discovered this post from 2021 where I mentioned perusing the Judge Parker Wikipedia article and discovering that Randy had a long-lost sister named Ann, something that I had apparently completely forgotten by the time Ann reappeared in the strip two and a half years later).

Mary Worth, 11/13/26

Oh, I guess I forgot to mention that Nelly confessed to Mary that the reason she’s a miserable, hateful monster is that she had a daughter who died some unspecified amount of time ago and she’s still very sad about it, and Mary, who at one point canonically had a dead husband who now she never talks or thinks about, immediately launched into her patented therapy technique of telling someone to simply use the force of their will to stop being sad by any means necessary. Sometimes this involves forcing the subject to focus their thoughts on happiness to the exclusion of all else or alter their own memories, but she’s starting small, with hobbies. Nelly, have you considered that going outside and playing some sport might take your mind off your inconsolable grief? Oh, arthritis? Hmm. Well, have you considered starting cruel rumors about others to make sure that the rest of the world suffers just like you do?

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Dick Tracy, 11/12/26

BIG REVEAL IN DICK TRACY: That weird tiny old man who gets carried around everywhere is a Marine who fought in a battle that took place 76 years ago, which means he’s in his early-to-mid 90s at this point. Presumably back then he was a weird tiny young man who got carried around everywhere, so I’m not sure how effective he was in combat. You’d think this big reveal would’ve been more appropriate for Veterans Day, but I guess Dick Tracy has agreed to cede that holiday to Pluggers, which I respect.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 11/12/26

The composition of this strip bothers me so much! Why do we need Grimm to say the title of the book, and Attila to react to it, when we can also see it printed on the cover? Like it should’ve been Grimm’s dialogue in panel two and then the visual of Ralph in panel three. That’s all you need! Maybe the artist thought, “Oh, I have to have him say it out loud, because some people only listen to the dialog and never read anything,” which doesn’t make sense but makes more sense than anything else.

Luann, 11/12/26

I decided to free myself from reading Luann daily around 2014, and then, for reasons I cannot really articulate, I decided to start inflicting it upon myself again in 2025. All sorts of horrible things happened during that lacuna, I’m sure, most of which I blessedly have no knowledge of, but I am vaguely aware that there was some tragic non-romance storyline between Bernice and a tortured artist type. I was not aware that there were sexy (?) shoes involved in her abortive seduction attempt, and I probably would’ve happily gone to my grave never knowing, but now I will always be cursèd by this particular bit of knowledge. I wouldn’t have bought shoes with that backstory either, mysterious off-panel stranger!

Alice, 11/12/26

BIG REVEAL IN ALICE: That email that Alice was waiting for? It was a thank-you email! STAKES: RAISED

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Hi and Lois, 11/11/26

As I like to occasionally remind my readers, thanks to comic strip time you have been reading Hi and Lois and following the non-adventures of Trixie Flagston for decades, and all the running bits involving her seem like old hat to you, but Trixie is literally a baby, less than a year old, and from her perspective she’s experiencing many of the things you see happening to her for the very first time. That’s probably why she looks so gobsmacked here. Maybe this is the first time in her entire life (i.e., the last several months) that it’s ever rained two days in a row! Where’s her friend Sunbeam? Is he dead?

Pluggers, 11/11/26

Happy Veterans Day! Do you carry a metal water bottle with you, so you can stay hydrated while saving money and cutting down on unnecessary litter? Well, I hope you enjoy stealing valor, asshole.