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Comics archive! Mark Trail

I know this sounds absurd, but shouldn’t that deer be on a … leash? Or something?

Mark Trail, 3/31/14

As was foretold in prophecy Friday, Mark has shrugged off a sucker-punch to the face and responded with fisticuffs of his own, somehow managing to wind up and knock Marlin down with a right hook despite literally being an inch and a half away from him. Still, this victory is bittersweet, as Mark looks poignantly at the avalanche of sea turtle eggs cascading comically out of Marlin’s green poachin’-sack. Yes, there’s an exclamation point at the end of his dialogue, but based on his stricken facial expression I would guess that this is as close as we’ve ever come to seeing Mark on the verge of tears, bereft over the senseless loss of endangered animal life.

By the way, is sea turtle egg-poaching an actual thing? Like, could those eggs ever hatch now that they’ve been removed from their nest and plopped in a big pile in a bag? Do people try to keep sea turtles as pets? Do people eat sea-turtle eggs? Have we been reading the wrong meaning of “poaching” in this storyline all along?

Apartment 3-G, 3/31/14

Thank goodness Tommie has rented a freakishly enormous car from the 1940s so that there’s plenty of room for her deer friend to … sit? stand? … in the back seat. I love the way Tommie just talks to Lily like she can understand English, while the deer stares ahead with its black soulless eyes, thinking about murder.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 3/31/14

Good lord, Snuffy’s disgust with Jughaid is palpable. “I don’t care if he is kin, I ain’t gonna have no aesthete living under my makeshift roof!”

Pluggers, 3/31/14

Pluggers are just straight-up car thieves and don’t care what you think about it.

Punchopalypse now

Mark Trail, 3/29/14

OK, fine, I haven’t been keeping you properly up to date on the doings in Mark Trail, but at least I’m letting you know when Mark finally gets around to punching someone! Let’s all … wait, what? That’s … that’s not Mark’s fist? That’s Mark’s face? Oh, man, I gotta … I gotta lay down. Gotta rest up. Rest up for next week. There’s gonna be all kinds of punching next week. Mark hasn’t been punched in a while. You can tell from the dust cloud that puffs out from where Marlin’s fist makes impact. He’s not going to like this. Not one bit.

Apartment 3-G, 3/29/14

Wait, did Lily the deer just say “bleat”? Jeez, the forest animals are never going to accept her city ways! “I say, fellow deer, this grass certainly is more lush than what I’m used to in Central Park! Anything around here to wash it down with? Surely there must be a Starbucks nearby! Bleat!”

B.C. and Wizard of Id, 3/29/14

B.C. did a joke about “haters” and Wizard of Id did a joke about “cougars,” in case you were still holding on to your will to live! The best I can say here is that at least B.C. didn’t try to draw a hater.

All the Gil Thorp you need

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Gil Thorp, 3/18/14

Wow, here’s some serious narrative compression, nicely mirrored by matching enormous facepalms in the outside panels. Baseball season begins, and the highlight of the Ritual Roster Reading is the need to cover third base using accident-prone “Lucky” Haskins, whom we met yesterday losing an encounter with a kitchen cabinet door. Fast-forward to “Sure, Milford lost the playdowns, but Haskins wasn’t to blame, because baseball takes more than luck! It takes skill, and practice, and dedication, and we have none of those things! Oh yeah, and coaching – how did I even forget that?”

Kaz is going to kill himself if he keeps lifting like that.

Hi and Lois, 3/18/14

Made over, made up, and drowsy with happiness in her new home in the Valley, Irma Thurston tells Lois how she dumped Thirsty for a career in porn, as one of her co-stars wanders through with a prop.

Mark Trail, 3/18/14

Whenever one of his stories gets complicated, Mark calls a real journalist like this guy.

– Uncle Lumpy