Archive: Gil Thorp

Post Content

Beetle Bailey, 3/13/24

I’m not a huge fan of “Miss Buxley is the only sexually available female at Camp Swampy and the men all line up in hopes of being chosen by her, for sex,” but I do like that Rocky has shown up with a six-pack. Take a risk! Might not be what she likes but it also just might be, and you’ve got stand out from the pack somehow!

Gil Thorp, 3/13/24

I don’t know if they actually do full-on suplexes (suplices?) like this in high school wrestling, and I’m not going to look into it, either, because I’m afraid that if I plug “girl’s high school wrestling” into Google Image Search I’m going to end up on a watchlist. But this does happen, I have to imagine that it’s among the most exciting things to happen in the course of a bout, which is why I think it’s kind of odd to cut away literally before Inma’s opponent hits the floor to check in with Marty Moon and hear what he has to say about, like, hockey or whatever.

Mark Trail, 3/13/24

All the market research shows it: what the people want is a soap opera newspaper comic strip about somebody shitting themselves in the context of a musical performance. But of course, the industry’s last few shreds of dignity are preventing the syndicate from really pulling the trigger. Rex Morgan got close with the tale of a guy pretending to shit himself so that he could bump himself up from opener to headliner. But can we get closer still? What if the musician … wasn’t a person at all? Exciting news possibilities await!

Post Content

Shoe, 3/9/24

The bird-people of Shoe generally have two emotional registers: horrified and very depressed. So I’m pleased that Shoe has discovered a third one, even though it’s apoplectic rage. The Perfesser has mostly slept through it, but it’s still an important step.

Pardon My Planet, 3/9/24

Not sure what’s worse here: that Pardon My Planet doesn’t know what socialism is, or that Pardon My Planet doesn’t know why that piggy was going to market.

Gil Thorp, 3/9/24

Gil has tried a lot of tactics for getting his student-athletes to improve their performance — coaching them, not coaching them, coaching them but real half-assed, getting other people to coach them for him, and so forth. But it turns out that the best technique of all is to simply exude the pleasant vibes that can only be created by sexual satisfaction.

Post Content

Gil Thorp, 3/8/24

Gil Thorp may be a somewhat manic strip at times, but never say it doesn’t play a long narrative game. Remember the comely bartendress Gil was awkwardly flirting with nearly two years ago? Well, big news: Gil’s divorced now, and it’s time to make out! Gil even went the extra mile and rented a room in this … bar? Hotel? It’s a hotel bar, I guess? The important thing is that he doesn’t want to go back to a girl’s house, because he might catch cooties.

Marvin, 3/8/24

Marvin’s been doing this “she said/he heard” bit all week, which I find irritating because it’s not clear if this just supposed to be wishful thinking on his part of actually indicating his inability to properly parse spoken language. The latter seems ridiculous based on what we’ve seen of his intellectual capacities over the years, but on the other hand he is literally a baby, so! Anyway, I like the touch in this strip where in Marvin’s mind, he’s full clothed for this interaction. Almost as if, against all odds, he does actually have some dignity.