Post Content

Apartment 3-G, 10/29-30/05

How heartbreakingly sad is Tommie’s look of pathetic, unbearable happiness in panel three of Saturday’s strip? I can think of two possible reasons for her joy, each more depressing than the next:

• Tommie has convinced herself that, after years of being mousily nice to Margo when everybody else has abandoned her for being such a mean old B, the raven-haired beauty has finally forgotten all about FBI Pete and his ilk and has realized that the only one for her (Margo) is her (Tommie), the one who’s been there for her (Margo) all those years when Lu Ann was off having adventures and dyslexia and getting engaged and whatever the hell else it is she (Lu Ann) does, and now at this moment Tommie is sure that she (Margo) is about to plant a wet one on her (Tommie’s) lips; or:
• Tommie realized that she’s had dialogue in every strip this week.

In her little fantasy balloon Saturday, Tommie makes the elementary error of assuming that the Parthenon is within 150 yards of every location in Greece. By Sunday, our skimpily dressed trio of roommates have already discovered that this is not true, as they’ve decamped to Lesbos. (Yes, Lesbos. Let’s all make the “Lesbian” cracks in our heads and then move on, shall we?) I’m disgruntled by the Professor’s “brought the sunshine with you” comment; since, unlike FBOFW, Apartment 3-G does not take place in real time, this little island getaway could be happening any time of year, so I’m not sure what the point of establishing the weather as abnormally warm is, unless we’re setting up an exciting new plotline where the girls control the Earth’s climate with their minds.

What’s mostly impressed me about this little scene, though, is how it smacks of story-wrapping-up-time. Mary Worth takes weeks and weeks to kill each of its plots, then beat, dismember, and burn their corpses and scatter the parts in strategic locations around town. Apartment 3-G just dumps the bodies of its storylines in the river: no fuss, no muss. Sure, Lu Ann’s just seen what she thought was a relationship that was going to last the rest of her life go down in flames, and the man she once saw as a paragon of selflessness was revealed as a self-centered control freak; but a little walking around Manhattan and quick vacation in the Aegean and she’s apparently good as new! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: life’s pretty easy when you’re dumb and shallow.

Post Content

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/19/05

Rex looks puzzled and anxious in panel three. Missing thought balloon: “Soccer ball? Does he think I went to some kind of European medical school! Damn it man, try to hold it together!”

Apartment 3-G, 10/20/05

Lu Ann, your engagement is falling apart! Your love life is crisis! This is no time for hand-jiving!

Hagar the Horrible, 10/21/05

Yeah, it’s just as ridiculous as saying that people will play a game that involves knocking a tiny ball into a hole with little sticks! Or that there will be an organized medical profession! Or institutionalized and regular taxation! Or … oh, why do I bother?

Post Content

So I slacked off the whole weekend, going off “having fun” and “enjoying myself” instead of posting comics for your amusement. O the shame! And during such a wacky weekend for the serials, too. Here’s a quick recap, one panel at a time:

Tommie and Lu Ann showed off their synchronized head bobbling.

“Brick” House showed off his vocabulary.

Mimi let her cloaking device briefly disengage and showed off the steel hair and terrifying, alien visage that keeps her EON minions in line.

Dr. Jeff showed off his mastery of platitudes.

And Spider-Man showed off … well, I’m not really comfortable talking about what Spider-Man showed off.

Meanwhile, in da hood…

Curtis, 10/17/05

Holy cow, Curtis is getting interesting! First it gets rid of one side of the comics’ least interesting love triangle, then it takes on gun-fueled school violence! No doubt by the time you read this you’ll know who’s holding that gun, but right now I’m on tenterhooks. Is it Chutney? Gunk? Barry? Or just another kid who listened to a little too much “Fortyounce” or “Bullet-Wound,” which is going to result in a Valuable Lesson About Media Violence?

Oh, and speaking of boring love triangles and violence:

Luann, 10/17/05

Yeah, just visiting a pal … in the back seat of his moving car! Seriously, did Dirk just materialize behind Brad completely unbidden and announced? Am I missing something here? Is the Dirk storyline going to be resolved in the only way that will make it all worthwhile: with the revelation that “Dirk” is a figment of Brad’s imagination, a representation of his untrammeled, unrepressed id combined with his repressed homoerotic fantasies? A guy can dream, can’t he?