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B.C. and Marvin, 11/24/13

If Thanksgiving’s coming, it must be time for one of my least favorite comics tropes: terrifyingly self-aware animals begging not be eaten. Today’s B.C. is a particularly gruesome example of the genre, made all the more vivid by the poor victim-turkey explaining in great detail the real-life unsavory conditions under which many factory farmed animals are raised. For sheer narrative power, though, you can’t beat panels two and three of Marvin: first, we see a panicked turkey, unable to speak English but still obviously aware of his coming fate; then we see Marvin’s family feasting on his corpse.

Panels from Mark Trail, 11/24/13

The whole Ben-Franklin-wanted-the-turkey-to-be-our-national-bird thing is a myth, pretty much. Franklin never made a serious political proposal to this effect or anything; he just wrote a letter to his daughter, in which he said that the eagle in the proposed design for the Great Seal of the United States looked like a turkey, and then, in typical witty Frankly fashion, wrote a couple of paragraphs about how turkeys are better and more noble than eagles anyway. I do like that Mark doesn’t bother correcting Rusty but also doesn’t go out of his way to really affirm his incorrect beliefs either. “Yeah, I remember hearing that when I was young and stupid like you, Rusty. Now sit back and shut up, because I’m gonna drop some turkey facts on you for the rest of this strip (not pictured).”

Apartment 3-G, 11/24/13

I know I haven’t been keeping you up to date on what’s happened in Apartment 3-G this week, so, uh, here’s what happened in Apartment 3-G this week, pretty much! Thanks, Sunday summary Apartment 3-G! The only new information we get in this strip is that Dr. Bentley likes to tickle teenage girls under their chins, which, grossssss.

Funky Winkerbean, 11/24/13

“Let’s just say your father was a terrible, hateful person and that we’re all glad he’s dead! We’re protecting you from this knowledge, but the strip sure isn’t doing the same for its readers!”

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Herb and Jamaal, 11/23/13

Don’t you just wish you were a dog, sometimes? Don’t you wish that all your intellectual human knowledge about sanitation, and all that ingrained human near-instinctive revulsion at dirt and contamination would just vanish in an instant, so you’d be free? Free of shame, free of rules, just able to eat anything you want whenever you want, to roll around on your kitchen floor and come up with a faceful of ketchup dribblings, then lie there and lazily lick it off your chin? Nobody’s watching. Nobody’s here. You can do it. You can do it right now. You’re free. You’re free.

B.C., 11/23/13

Speaking of things people wouldn’t normally eat, people will eat things they wouldn’t normally eat, when they’re poor and desperate and hungry! Don’t look so smug there, turtle, you too are for the most part edible and no cultural taboo is that strong.

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Mark Trail, 10/30/13

Good news, everybody! The weird, svengali-like power Johnny Walker held over the poor innocent senator has at last been fully explained, now that he’s a smear of human hamburger at the bottom of a cliff. Fortunately, Johnny’s death will immediately remove this pall hanging over our heroes. Once the authorities learn that Johnny was responsible for all the wrongdoing, and that he died under bizarre circumstances with only the senator and his close friends and family as witnesses, the case will be closed and everything will go back to normal, just like it was before!

B.C., 10/30/13

Normally I’d make fun of this strip for completely abdicating on actually drawing a Miley Cyrus costume and just leaning on “haha, it’s funny because they said ‘twerking'”, but then I thought: do I want to see Team B.C.’s idea of what a teen girl ant wearing a Sexy Miley Cyrus outfit would look like? Does anyone? Answers: No, and, I’m reasonably certain, no. Let’s just enjoy the bullet we dodged. Ha ha, those prehistoric ants just said “twerking,” everybody! They’re just like us!

Family Circus, 10/30/13

I love Dolly’s expression of vague disdain. God damn it, Jeffy, do you want to learn how to huff or not?

Funky Winkerbean, 10/30/13

Ha ha, those army guys sure have a sense of gallows humor and/or complete lack of historical knowledge! Anyway, Cory and his whole platoon are going to die.