Post Content

Dennis the Menace, 5/3/21

Man, clearly the menace here is not Dennis, who’s merely playfully experimenting with the results of intensifying ontological categories, but rather Henry, who’s walking away from the table with a smug little smirk on his face. “Ha ha, Dennis you scamp,” he’s thinking, “Can’t let her get too comfortable! I’m carrying exactly one bowl into the kitchen, so I’m doing my part to clean up.”

Dick Tracy, 5/3/21

Say, how’s Sam and Dick’s witness babysitting going? Well, they lost him, but then they found him again. Ha ha, police work isn’t all fun and games! Sometimes it’s grinding attention to detail in pursuit of a suspect, and sometimes it’s endless bureaucracy and red tape. But other times it can be an invigorating round of hide and seek, which is, literally, fun and games. Enjoy it while it lasts, boys!

Judge Parker, 5/3/21

You’ve been tracking … the CIA’s movements? Like, the whole CIA? All [checks Wikipedia] 21,500 employees? Maybe the CIA shouldn’t have let April quit, she seems like she’s pretty good at spy stuff.

Post Content

Crock, 4/24/21

Man, I really respect how tired they made Maggot look in the final panel here. “Won’t beer cans explode? [extremely heavy sigh] Get it? Because I don’t know how to cook, and I’m an alcoholic? [long, awkward silence] Masculinity is a crushing prison.”

Dick Tracy, 4/24/21

I also respect how utterly disgusted Dick looks in his final panel today. Keep one of these deformed criminal freaks alive? That’s exactly the opposite of everything Dick stands for.

Hi and Lois, 4/24/21

Hi, your infant daughter is on the floor eating out of the dog’s bowl. I don’t think your kids would be doing significantly worse with Chip in charge, so why not go play golf, you know?

Mary Worth, 4/21/21

Oh, look, it’s an attractive blonde whose pupils are dilated with arousal at the mere sight of Dr. Drew! Could his life get any more dissatisfying?

Post Content

Slylock Fox, 4/21/21

Man, usually even the non-Slylockverse Slylock Fox True or False strips involve, like, animal facts of some kind. Yes, it’s technically true that people are also animals, and the weird, gross interiors of our ears are among the most distressing evicence of the repulsive biological foundations of our existence. Fun fact, I almost started googling about the microscopic creatures that I assume live in our ear canals for this post but then realized there might be pictures and wisely pulled myself back from the brink. But anyway, my point here is that this is a fairly odd subject for a Slylock strip, and has me wondering if it was made possible by a generous donation from Big Otorhinolaryngology, or maybe from Big Lollipop, since I suspect that retail sales of lollipops are quite low and now most people only get them when they’re handed out as a reward for seeking basic medical care.

Dick Tracy, 4/21/21

Oh, wow, I guess the members of the Apparatus in Dick Tracy are going to stop trying to kill Dick Tracy, which seems like it would take a lot of the oomph out of this strip, not gonna lie. I guess this is the sort of cautious movie you’d expect from a crime lord who puts on a ski mask to talk on the phone to one of his own allies. Fortunately for fans of ultraviolence everywhere, Dick Tracy is definitely not going to reciprocate and stop trying to kill the members of the Apparatus.

Gasoline Alley, 4/21/21

[my entire afternoon is derailed as I drop everything to write a multipage screed to Tribute Content Agency, LLC about induced demand]