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Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/2/25

So the big news that Augie delivered over pad thai is that not one but two publishers are interested in his manuscript and are bidding up the price! Is this the sort of thing that will finally get him riled up enough to have sex with his girlfriend? Well, no, apparently not. Sorry, Summer! He’s got papers to grade, and anyway Thai food does a number on his tummy, so you’re dodging a bullet, really.

Mary Worth, 11/2/25

“It sometimes feels like the good is getting better … and the bad is getting worse. But children like Olive give me hope that their psychic powers will turn the tide in the imminent final apocalyptic confrontation between the evil and the righteous.”

“Ha ha, so true! But through it all, one thing is for sure … our love is here to stay. That is for sure, right, Mary? Because you still haven’t changed your relationship status on Facebook.”

Garfield, 11/2/25

THINGS GARFIELD IS NOT AFRAID OF: The shades of the dead, terrifying the living by demonstrating that the veil between this world and the next is much thinner than you might believe

THINGS GARFIELD IS AFRAID OF: Running out of ice cream

THINGS GARFIELD SHOULD BE AFRAID OF: Having his flesh torn from his body and hung from a tree, where his soul remains trapped and in agony within a somehow still living husk

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/23/25

Last we saw of Truck and Cody, they had agreed to treat each other as honorary father and son and it was all very heartwarming. But here we are several days into Truck and Wanda’s wedding storyline and no sign of Cody! You know who did snag a coveted invite to this shindig, though, is Shorty and the Beanpole. Thank God Truck took my advice and didn’t have them perform, but still. Can you imagine what a dork-ass middle school these two twerps go to where they’re earning “so many points” by spending an evening with a bunch of adult roots country Americana Ameripolitan superfans?

Garfield, 9/23/25

I guess I just have to accept that “Garfield watches a vaguely animal-themed TV channel” is just part of the reality of the Garfiverse now, but I don’t have to like it. What kind of cruel management runs this network? They know he’s a cat, he put that right in his entry, so why are they giving him things cats hate? Are they anti-cat? Is this why they were showing pro-dog content the last time he was watching? Garfield, have some self-respect in your media consumption habits!

Pluggers, 9/23/25

“Pluggers are vain about their appearance and that drives them to buy a variety of personal grooming products.” Come on now. Are you even listening to yourself. You should be embarrassed by this. Embarrassed.

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Mary Worth, 9/16/25

It’s not exactly clear how much time in-strip is supposed to have elapsed between the current storyline and Olive’s original appearance in the strip; presumably it’s not the 11 years that have passed in real time, but probably like … five or six, I’m guessing? And one of the oddnesses of childhood is that five or six years wouldn’t seem so long to someone Mary’s age, but a kid in that scenario really would say “I remember” like it happened in another era. So, so far, so normal, except that Olive also says “remember” when she talks about her spooky visions of the life she and Mary lived in Ancient Egypt, so I think that adds a different valence to it. Anyway, I guess if you were a naive child, you might think that being able to talk to animals would make you a good vet, but hopefully she’ll get a chance to talk to Dr. Ed and learn that that job is just one dead pomeranian after another, and the only thing that would make it worse would be if you could hear the pomeranians speak in complete sentences.

Hi and Lois, 9/16/25

Lois is desperate to see some evidence that two people really can stay happily married to each other for any length of time, and she is not finding it today.

Family Circus, 9/16/25

Sure, Jeffy is being an idiot as usual, but don’t be so grotesquely smug about it, Billy. You didn’t arrange things so that time only flows in one direction, at the same rate for everyone in the same inertial referential frame! What if you were shot into space at relativistic speeds for an extended space voyage and Jeffy stayed on Earth and you came back and he was older? Who’d be smug then, huh, Billy? I mean, probably you, I guess, you’d be a worldwide celebrity and hero of exploration, and he’d still just be some guy, and an old guy to boot.

Garfield, 9/16/25

Wait, do you expect me to believe that notorious dog-hater Garfield is watching some kind of TV show starring a talking dog, and complimenting the talking dog character? Sorry, I don’t buy it. I don’t buy it at all. #notmygarfield #garfieldcanonicallyhasnothingbutcontemptfordogs