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Hagar the Horrible, 4/27/26

Big news, everyone! A new named character has been added to Hagar the Horrible, and he’s a servant/butler type named “Charles” with weird swoopy hair and a suit jacket but also a short unhemmed tunic/skirt situation going on. Probably we won’t ever see him again, but, I dunno, they gave him a name! Maybe we will! Who knows!

The Phantom, 4/27/26

Big news, everyone: There’s a new Phantom story starting that’s launching with a bang — a grey alien wearing a suit is flying in a private jet from Washington, D.C. to Guantanamo Bay — and while probably it won’t ever really live up to that opening image, you have to admit it’s the most incredible opening image any of the soap opera strips have given us in quite a while.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 4/27/26

Big news, everyone, and it’s not good: Grimm, the beloved title character from the syndicated newspaper comic strip Mother Goose and Grimm, hungers for human flesh.

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The Lockhorns, 4/20/26

A fun subtle running bit in The Lockhorns is that Leroy’s coworkers hold him in as much contempt as his wife does, but with a subtle difference in tone: Loretta is furious that she’s shackled to this loser forever, while his coworkers seem to enjoy him as the office clown, the lovable loser whose antics they presumably talk about at length when he’s out of earshot or maybe even when he’s just within it. Look at the big smile on the receptionist’s face as she delivers this zinger! Anyway, this kind of interaction is probably marginally less corrosive to Leroy’s soul than the ones he has with Loretta, so you can see why he puts up with the low pay, and also why they don’t pay him very much.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 4/20/26

“Oh man,” you probably woke up thinking, “it’s 4/20, the marijuana holiday! Now that recreational cannabis is more or less legal in most of the United States, have any of the syndicated newspaper strips chosen to ‘blaze it’ with a weed-themed joke?” Turns out the answer to your question is “Yes, exactly one, and it’s Mother Goose and Grimm,” which I admit isn’t what I expected.

Hagar the Horrible, 4/20/26

Oops, it looks like Hagar and Eddie and the crew have died at sea. And, frankly, that’s a good thing: we’ve grown affectionate towards them over the years, but they’re fundamentally a gang of thieves and murderers who leave a trail of misery and death in their wake. Rest in piss, fellas!

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Mary Worth, 4/17/26

Oh, I’m sorry, did you think there were stakes to this storyline? Did you think that losing two hundred thousand American dollars might have some material impact on Harvey’s life? Well, sorry, chumps, this motherfucker’s got ascot money and the whole episode is just kind of embarrassing for him to admit to his daughter, and probably more for horniness reasons than monetary ones. You know what, I’m not just glad “Trixie” escaped the compound; I’m actively glad the money went to a Southeast Asia-based crime lord, who’s at least showing some business acumen by building the compound in the first place.

Andy Capp, 4/17/26

Flo has never really had much character development over the past seven decades beyond “sick of Andy’s bullshit,” so I think today’s strip represents a small victory for feminism, even if the characterization offered is “really smug about not exercising.”

Hagar the Horrible, 4/17/26

“He knows what you Vikings did to Yorkshire and the Shetland Islands — and he wants revenge.”

Blondie, 4/17/26

Notice how Blondie doesn’t recommend Dagwood invest time and energie in their marriage? I mean, what’s the point, really? Anyway, she’s got her Sudokus, so whatever.