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Archive: Herb and Jamaal

136

Some old people and their problems

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Herb and Jamaal, 4/14/26

OK, Herb, that’s not what the expression is, first of all, it’s actually about ugly people, who I get you may not want to insult, but I’m just telling you, and second of all, all you’re saying is “to say they’re good at lying is to say [elaborate, awkward metaphor for someone being good at lying].” That’s tautological! Are they lying or not? It’s OK, you haven’t even said specifically who “they” are, so you can still reuse the strip whenever!

Mary Worth, 4/14/26

“I told them ‘Grandpa doesn’t even have a boat’ and ‘that never happened,’ but they just kept saying ‘Any old dude who wears a fuckin’ ascot everywhere has gotta be a boat guy,’ so hopefully you have a bunch of liquid cash to buy a boat with if you want your grandkids to ever spend time with you, because they’re not coming down here from Goleta unless there’s a boat involved.”

Dustin, 4/14/26

I actually appreciate the final panel here, where Dustin’s dad’s facial expression makes it clear that he’s had a truly harrowing experience trying to log on to his bank’s website. And good! That’s right, old man, the world is changing and you will never catch up! I hope you enjoy the icy feeling of death on the back of your neck, because it’s only going to get stronger!

168

Jamaal’s actually working, someone has to while Herb ruminates endlessly

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Luann, 4/2/26

“Oh my gosh,” you’re probably thinking. “Is Luann, the wildly ribald but perversely sexless comic strip about college students, implying that Les and Tara had sex?” No, dummy. She just came over to use and critique Les and Gunther’s bathroom. Remember, young men and women who are attracted to each other do bathroom–adjacent stuff all the time in this comic. It’s what they have instead of sex, I think!

Mary Worth, 4/2/26

“People have limits on which illusions they can accept,” says Toby, steadfastly refusing to turn around and see the pair of parrots eating out of a giant salad bowl on her counter. She needs to believe that this isn’t her life now! That’s the illusion she chooses to accept.

Herb and Jamaal, 4/2/26

Actually, Herb, making a mountain out of a molehill would take a great deal of dirt indeed, as the two are wildly divergent in size. That’s what gives the expression its meaning!

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The guy she’s killing is definitely not an immediate threat, right? Like this one’s just for fun

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Herb and Jamaal, 2/25/26

I assumed those plewds were supposed to be sweat, but then Herb mentions “crying” in the last panel and that sets up a much funnier possibility, which is that they’re tears and he’s fully dissociated from himself, his body weeping openly due to stress and unexpected exertion but his mind managing to hold a coherent conversation for at least a few minutes, before he presumably shuts down entirely.

Judge Parker, 2/25/26

Not satisfied with all the people she killed in the massive explosion that heralded her arrival, April is now straight-up gutting a dude like a fish, right in front of her beloved, soft-handed husband. Weird how the awful last sound the guy will ever make is exactly the same one that Charlie Brown makes when he tries and fails to kick a football that Lucy is holding, honestly!

Luann, 2/25/26

This one could have been drawn to make it clear that Frank is chuckling ruefully over his unrealistic youthful fantasies and obviously realizes now that being a faithful husband and father is more rewarding than some burnout musician lifestyle. But that is not his facial expression at all. He still 100% wishes he was in a band and resents every single person in this room for holding him back.